When we started talking as friends and she realized I was interested in her, she told me right away that any relationship she got into should lead to marriage. When I asked how, she answered that she’d been around for too long not to ask the right questions and made it very clear that she could only date for one year, and then marriage should follow. If the man didn’t agree, he had to leave her alone.

Two months later, I proposed. She asked if I was that man who was ready for marriage in a year, and I told her I was more than ready. I was also looking for a woman who wouldn’t waste my time. Right from the day she said yes, we started talking about how we wanted our wedding to look, how many children we wanted and even the kind of house we would build.

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Our relationship was only four months old when I called her one late evening and a guy answered the phone. I was confused. I looked at the name on my phone, and it was her name. I said I was looking for Mercy. He asked me, “What for?” And then told me Mercy was busy and hung up the call. I called again and again and again, but no one answered.

I quickly rushed to her place to see what was happening. It was almost 10 p.m., but she wasn’t in the house. I kept calling her phone until I called again and got the switched-off tone. I sat there bewildered, wondering what could be wrong with my girlfriend. I was at her gate around 12 a.m. when she came. When she saw me, she quickly ran to hug me. “I knew you’d be waiting for me. You see why I love you.”

I asked what happened to her phone, and she said it got stolen. I told her I called and a man picked up, and she said that man had been playing hide-and-seek with her since he stole her phone, and it was the reason she hadn’t been in the house. He made her wait for him at a taxi station until she called and the phone was off. I told her it was just a phone and we would get a new one.

Right the next morning, she called to tell me the man had returned her phone. I asked how. “He didn’t actually steal the phone after turning it off.” She said the guy gave the phone to an Okada rider to deliver it that same morning. The story didn’t make sense. It suddenly set off my alarm bells, but I gave her the impression that I was okay with the story she was selling me.

I would go to her place without telling her. She would say goodnight on the phone, and several minutes later, I would be at her door, knock until she responded, and then I would run away. I did this for over two months and found nothing untoward. We were supposed to travel to meet her parents, but she cancelled at the eleventh hour because there was an office funeral to attend. “The mother of a colleague who’s very close to me. I can’t miss that funeral.”

I agreed, but that very evening, I went to her house and there was light in her room. I was standing right there when the light went off. I called her phone. She didn’t pick up. And then I saw her come out of the room. I was calling again when she called me. I was looking at her from a dark corner. She said, “The place was noisy. That’s why I couldn’t pick up. I had to find a quiet place.”

I was standing there shaking with heart pains but talking to her like all was well. When I said goodbye, she went back inside. I tiptoed around her window, and then I heard the voice of a man. They were loud and happy. They were having fun while my knees were wobbly and almost giving up. A relatively new relationship was falling apart right before my eyes. Several wild thoughts ran through my mind, but I settled for peace.

I walked slowly back home with no clear direction as to what I was going to do. In the morning, she sent me a photo of herself and her friends. They were all in black attire. She said they were going for the burial service, and then she would set off back home. I told her to take good care of herself.

We are still together, acting like all is well and even planning our wedding. Just last week, she took me to meet her parents after several postponements. Her dad said, “Once you’ve brought a man home, it only means it won’t be long until I receive the dowry drinks from my in-laws.” He then laughed, and I also smiled while nodding at what he said.

Who Would You Choose, A Rich Man Or A Man Who’s Good In Bed?

I’m only dating her for a year, as we promised each other. And just when she thinks everything is figured out, I will tell her the whole story and walk away. Currently, I’m only healing in a relationship that caused the pain I’m healing from. We’ve done nine months together. There are so many things to love about her. She’s beautiful. She’s hardworking. She dreams big. She’s all that, but why won’t she tell us the truth? I mean the two men she’s dating.

Or maybe she’s dating us both to see who’ll end up marrying her. Anyway, we have only a few months. I will walk away like everything we had didn’t matter.

—Bernard   

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