
Ayo and I have been talking for a while. He often spoke about taking me out on a proper date. I have quite a busy schedule so it took some time before it happened. I had been really looking forward to it because it was supposed to mark the end of our talking stage. In the sense that we could decide to take the relationship to the next level or leave things as friends. I was open to whatever outcome but I expected it to proceed positively.
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I looked my best and smelled good too. When I got there, he looked all confident and gentlemanly. After some chit-chat, the waiter brought us the menu. I looked through it but I already knew what I was going to eat.
When we were ready, Ayo called the waiter to take our order. He ordered rice with grilled chicken. The waiter wrote it down and turned to look at me before asking, “What about you, madam?”
I decided to order the one thing I actually enjoy. Swallow. I said, “Please, I will have eba with ogbono soup.” Ayo gave an amused smile as if to ask, “Are you serious?” Of course, I was. I love eba.
When the food arrived, he looked at my plate and his whole mood changed. The entire time I was enjoying my meal he would look at me and frown. Eventually, he asked, “Why did you order swallow? You’re too local for my liking.”
I was taken aback for a second. When I regained my composure I told him calmly, “I’m a Nigerian woman. I can’t be faking lifestyle. Besides, eba fills my stomach better than rice. It can carry me throughout the rest of the day. If I eat rice, I will be hungry soon.”
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He didn’t like that answer at all. He looked at me as if I had said the most insane thing ever. Then he paid for the food and stormed out. I stared at his angry retreating back in shock.
Now I’ve been thinking, was I indeed, too local, as he said? Should I have asked him what to eat before ordering? I don’t think I did anything wrong by being myself ordering what I liked.
—Dami
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Don’t stop being yourself for anyone
Don’t be surprised to find him eating garri in his house
That’s a big red flag, let him go
He will be a dictator in your lifetime
I kiss the ground on which you walk. Keep being you. Let no one change that.
That’s a big bloody red flag and I am glad you saw it yourself. In addition, do not stop being yourself and always keep it real. It is not as if you brought the Eba and Ogbono from your house, it’s on the menu so you’re free to choose whatever you want cos it’s freaking date, you’re not obligated to eat whatever he’s having. You don’t even have to worry yourself over his childish and silly attitude. Block him off and delete his number and also on all social media pages.
Ignore him. You did nothing wrong. Love you for not pretending and being real to yourself. It’d shock you to find out that Ayo is probably a founding member of the Soaking Garri club.