My boyfriend was breaking my heart. There was only one person I could talk to about it, my friend, Abena. She was there when the relationship started. When we faced problems, she was the one I talked to, and usually, she helped bring clarity to the situation.

When I got to her house, her mom told me she was not home. She asked why I didn’t call before coming. When I told her my phone was off, so she should allow me to charge it for a while and call Abena, she said no. Their house was facing electrical problems, so I couldn’t charge my phone there. Her attitude looked off. She was very welcoming anytime I visited, but this one looked like I wasn’t allowed there.

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I thanked her, and just when I was turning away to leave, Abena’s door swung open and Abena came out. I looked at the face of her mother. She looked away and then asked Abena when she entered the house because she didn’t see her entering. Abena kept shouting my name as if she was amazed that I was there: “Eiii Barbara, you’re here? Barbara, I didn’t know you were coming ooo.”

She was virtually shouting my name in a weird way. I asked myself why everyone was acting strange. Before my wandering mind could settle, I saw a figure peep through Abena’s window and quickly go back inside when our eyes met. He looked familiar. All of a sudden, I understood why everyone was acting weird. The one who looked at me through the window was Alan. Alan was the same boyfriend I was having issues with.

Just a few months prior, I got pregnant by him. I was settled in my soul that I was going to be a mother. I thought he loved me too much not to make me his wife before the pregnancy began showing or maybe after the baby had been delivered. I was very sure of one of these outcomes. But when I told him, he said, “No, we can’t have a baby.”

“What do you mean we can’t have a baby? I’m already carrying one,” I responded.

He asked, “You think you’re ready to be a mom when you’re not married?”

I couldn’t convince him, no matter how I tried to make him look at the brighter side. He insisted I should let go and that we could make a new baby once we were ready.

I ran to Abena. I cried in her arms until I fell asleep on her bed. When I woke up, she was also sleeping next to me. I felt the two of us were connected in a moment of my problems. When she woke up, she told me to listen to Alan and save our relationship. There was more ahead of us than behind us. It hurt me deeply, but I understood it from a point of preservation of our relationship. What was the point of having a child who wouldn’t have a father? So I quietly went to the clinic and got it done.

I had a hug from Alan as payment for letting a piece of me go. He said he loved me and thanked me for listening to him. When I told Abena I’d done it, she patted me on the back and told me all was not lost. A few months later, I’m standing in front of Abena’s house, and everything that was happening was telling me that all was lost.

I didn’t ask why Alan was in her room. I wanted to go in there to find out for myself. She held me to break my stride. She told me she had a visitor, someone I hadn’t met before, and it wasn’t the right moment to see that someone. Little did she know that that someone had met my eyes and cast a very familiar shadow.

While struggling to prevent me from entering, her mom popped up again to tell me I should listen and obey, knowing very well the house wasn’t mine. “You come here very often doesn’t mean it’s your house too. Listen to the owner of the house and obey.”

I told her I knew Alan was there. She said I shouldn’t be ridiculous. I told her I’d made eye contact with him when he came to look through the window. She looked back and realized that was a possibility but insisted it wasn’t him. So I grudgingly left. They didn’t know I was still hanging around, so several minutes later, I saw him and Abena coming out of the house. I quickly rushed to meet them right in the compound.

My heart was breaking into pieces. I knew the answer, but I still asked, “Alan, you know I saw you because you saw me too. What were you doing in Abena’s room? Oh, she’s the reason you’re treating me the way you’re doing these days? When did it start? Are you two so evil to do this to me?”

Abena tried to walk away. I held her by the shoulder to make her stay. She still pulled away and left. Alan said I wasn’t his mother, so I couldn’t ask him silly questions. I could let Abena go, but not him. It turned into a fight. He pushed me out of his way, and I held on to his shirt. I’m a shy person, but that day I didn’t mind the little crowd I was drawing. I held on to his shirt and asked for an explanation. Abena’s mother came by. I added her to the fight. I called her an embarrassment and asked if she would still act this way if it was done to her daughter.

I left the scene with my head bowed. I felt defeated, cheated, betrayed, and boxed into a corner, but I decided not to fight again. Abena never called to apologize. Alan said I couldn’t determine his love story and who he could fall for. I love time because of this story I’m sharing. I’ve been a witness to how it heals the broken parts of our story and also makes everything make sense in the end. The healing journey was way too long than I anticipated, but I allowed it to be a pilgrimage.

Just two years later, they got married. I dated him for the same period. Their marriage was about seven months old when Abena had a daughter. It only means they were already pregnant when they got married. I asked for the same thing when I was pregnant, but he said we couldn’t have a baby.

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Three years later, their marriage was over. I heard about everything leading to their divorce. The abuse. The several cheating stories. Alan had another child that, mathematically, looks like the lady was pregnant while he was with me. That aside, he got another lady pregnant while his wife was also pregnant. It’s a small town, and this story was all over the place. Finally, Abena left the marriage.

Talk about karma, and I’ll tell you I’ve seen it at work before. She’s unemployed and has a child and a baby daddy who is always in court for not paying child support to his numerous baby mamas. Time tells the story in full, and the full story is that Abena saved me, but I didn’t know it earlier.

—Barbara     

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