I first met Ray at a friend’s birthday party held at a hotel. That night, we stayed close to each other as if we had known each other from Adam, like two long-lost friends who had found each other again.

The night ended with him booking a room for me at the hotel. It felt like a sweet gesture until I put two and two together and realized he was simply trying to buy his way into sleeping with me. He was in the room while I took my bath. When I came out, he started trying his luck, but I managed to throw him out, shut the door in his face, and lock him outside. The next day, he came back with apologies and a promise.

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“I’m sorry for what happened yesterday. I was under the influence of alcohol. It won’t happen again. I want to know you, and I want us to start on a clean slate.”

He said he enjoyed talking to me that night and that I sounded like a woman who knew her worth. He wanted to be around me and get to know me better. He did most of the talking on the way home, which was good because he revealed a lot about himself.

He had a child. The child’s mother was no longer in the picture, but they were peacefully co-parenting. He said he was looking for a girlfriend, someone to build something right and untouchable with.

Honestly, it sounded like a pity trap to me, so I told him exactly what I thought. If he were only saying all those things because he didn’t get sex the previous night. I told him he should forget it because he wasn’t going to be successful with that approach either.

He laughed and said that was not what was happening, that I should just relax.

After he dropped me off at home, things started getting interesting, very interesting. We spent many hours on the phone, either talking or texting about random things. One day, I mentioned that I had a dream of travelling outside the country to seek greener pastures.

He immediately offered to help. He started asking questions about where I wanted to go, what skills I had, whether I had a passport, if I had read about the process, and so on.

We ended that conversation with the understanding that I was going to travel, and Ray was going to be the knight in shining armour. The one who helped me travel. The one I would thank years later when telling the story of how I made it abroad.

So he started the process.

Some weeks later, he announced that he had secured me a visa, but it was an electronic visa. For close to a month, this guy kept saying he was booking my flight, yet I had not even seen the visa he claimed to have processed. He kept saying everything was ready and all I needed to do was pack my bags.

While all that was going on, he was constantly worrying me about when I was finally going to give myself to him, as if we were exchanging gifts.

“When should I come so I can buy protection?” he would ask.

It became frustrating, so I asked him to stop the process because I could handle it myself.

Can you imagine? After taking control of the process, I found out that no visa had ever been issued in my name. Ever. Then he came back again with an apology and a cheque worth more than 20,000 to appease my soul. It was actually more than that, but I don’t want to disclose the exact amount.

I took it to the bank, only for the teller to tell me that the signature on the cheque did not match the signature on the account, so I could not withdraw the money.

I went back to him with my tail between my legs, my whole body burning with embarrassment.

What kind of first-hand humiliation had I just endured? Why would he let me disgrace myself like that? By now, I was sure the teller thought the worst of me, probably believing I was trying to steal.

Once again, he managed to calm me down and promised he would give me the money in cash instead, so I shouldn’t worry.

This time, he gave me only 10,000 out of the 20,000, but it came with a condition again. He wanted to sleep with me.

He said we were helping each other. That day in the room was not easy. A man who wants to be intimate with you can becomes a world champion debater. I wasn’t backing down or giving in that easily.

He went on his knees. He literally begged me. He said that if I wouldn’t let him sleep with me, then I should at least show him my private part. He said the physical picture alone would be enough for him to carry on with his day. He claimed the uncertainty was slowly draining him.

He begged me until I gave in. I even felt pity for him. I sat on the sofa and spread my legs for him to see. You should have seen his face. It was like Moses seeing the Promised Land but not being allowed to enter it. He looked completely satisfied.

Then he got up, smiling, and took his leave.

After everything that happened, would you believe it became a trending topic among his friends? He went around boasting to them. ” E lef small, I go chop aa. I see the thing, next time I go enter am”  They said, he said it will glee in his eyes. The moment the news got to me, I distanced myself from him. I stopped replying to his messages and stopped giving him access to me in every possible way.

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But he kept coming back. He even proposed that I should only accompany him to events and different places. In return, he would spoil me and give me anything I asked for.

Nope. I would never associate with a man of his calibre ever again.

—Melissa

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