Growing up, I attended a private school. Life was normal. Just the regular classes, friends, and routines. There was this senior, Liam. He always topped his class. Everyone admired him. I liked him for that, but we never spoke. He was three classes ahead of me; our worlds barely touched.

Years later, we found ourselves in the same university. I didn’t even know he was there until a family friend, Kojo, introduced us. We exchanged contacts. He was in his final year, studying Biomedical Sciences. When I needed help with admissions and all those medical forms that can make your head spin, he took it upon himself and printed the documents.

He advised me and even chose my hostel room. In short, he wiped every stress off my plate. Soon, his visits became routine. Once or twice a week, he would show up at my hall with guidance, laughter, and affection tucked under his arm.

We got so close that he told me he liked me. I liked him too, but I didn’t show it at first. He persisted patiently. His patience paid off. I agreed to be with him a few months down the line. He was my first love.

Everything I felt for him was sweet yet so intense that it consumed me. Our love was strong and the drama was in the same measure.

One day, I went to visit him at his hostel. Just as we were talking, a lady stormed in. She didn’t have time for civility or pleasantries. “Why have you been ignoring me?” She went straight for Liam. I learned later that her name is Janita. She was angry and shaking. Liam tried to act nonchalant but I could see guilt all over his face.

I couldn’t believe it. How could this man who looked like he descended from heaven be toying with another woman’s emotions? I was expecting him to say something to her in his defence but he was quiet the entire time she ranted. I felt so unsettled by the scene that I left the two of them there.

It was later, when he came to my hall, that he explained. According to him, he and Janita had been close in his early university years. They had acted like a couple, but they had never officially dated. However, the girl believed they were together. I didn’t believe him fully but I chose to let it go.

Despite the lies slipping here and there, his love was undeniable. He was jealous, protective, sometimes even overbearing. I couldn’t make male friends on campus without raising some kind of alarm. If he didn’t call, my day was incomplete. I would just read or scroll through TikTok till he appeared. I didn’t complain because his care, and his guidance kept me anchored.

After graduation, both Liam and Janita became teaching assistants in their departments. Later, Liam got accepted into an accelerated PhD program. Not long after, I heard Janita had also secured an accelerated PhD in the U.S., but in another state. Liam assured me he was done with her completely.

He has now been in the U.S. for three years. I also just completed my teaching assistantship, hoping to follow in his footsteps. “My boyfriend is my mentor,” I always told people, half-joking, half-serious.

Through all this time, he has provided for me, supported me, pushed me academically, guided my decisions, and even tried to help me join him over there. As an academic, he loves to be surrounded by driven people, and he always encouraged me to rise to my fullest potential.

Yet… trust has been my biggest battle.

We talk every day, but any mention of Janita sets off tension. He’s now discussing marriage, planning our future, and mapping out life after his PhD. I’ve been waiting for him for three years — loving him, growing with him — but those little shadows from the past keep whispering.

Because the truth is simple: Liam had a talent for lying. And not just to me. He lied to Janita too. Sometimes his explanations were so creative, they were almost comical. I would call and call, and when he finally picked up, he would claim he had gone to visit his aunt who lived near campus. Later, I learned he was with Janita this entire time.

I’ll never forget one incident that happened when he was still in Ghana. He said he was stepping out to make a money transfer — just a short walk from his hostel. I sat in his room and waited. And waited. And waited. Hours later, he returned sweaty, dusty, looking like he had fought a spiritual battle. His explanation was that he had swapped phones with a university security officer by accident and had to wait for the man to return. While I wanted to believe him, the story fit too neatly into his wider pattern of deception.

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On another occasion, he claimed he was helping his boss at home. Meanwhile, he was with Janita. His lies were perfectly timed enough to keep both of us in separate, peaceful bubbles of ignorance. Later, when Janita and I compared notes, we realised we had been fooled… and fooled very well.

Do you know that everything he told me about her — that they weren’t officially dating — was a lie? She was actually his girlfriend of four years. Everyone in his department knew them because he was the president and she was an organiser. They were practically a departmental power couple. Hmm.

Is There A Perfect One Out There For Everyone?

I can’t deny that Liam has been the most influential person in my life. He has shaped me, guided me, and mentored me. I look up to him. I aspire to be like him. But he has also lied to me more times than I can count.

Upon all the evidence I have gathered, he insists she is nothing. He said whatever she told me was in the past. My question is, should I believe such a man?

—Jayjay

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