10 years after marriage, last week by this time, my husband looked me in the eye and apologised to me. “I am sorry that I brought you out here without an appropriate plan for your life. I should have allowed us to try a long-distance marriage so you could have your own thing doing.” I asked him not to worry about it and went about our day.

That same night on the bed, I wept my eyes out because as much as I asked him to let it be, it hit me right at my core.

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I was born and bred in Tema. All my life was in Tema. I had hustled and bustled for a better life before I met him. I was working as a customer representative in one of the telecommunications companies. But when I got married, I left it all and moved to be with my husband, who has a ministry here in Sunyani. I didn’t think much of it while moving. I said to myself, “It’s just a job. I am a brilliant girl. I’ll get one before I know it.”

If I had known, if I knew then what I know now, I would have carefully considered my choice and walked it through. For 10 years, he has shouldered all of our responsibilities. He has a mother and siblings too who depend on him. We have three children, and we intend to give them the very best too.

He has tried farming and a clothing business, but it ends up nowhere. As soon as he tried to venture into another business, we’d receive a prophecy from a complete stranger telling him God had asked him to focus entirely on his ministry and that He would take care of us.

I am learning a trade now, bakery and catering. When I finish well, I can start something and help my family.

The story about Jennifer yesterday made me weak in my knees. I have not stopped thinking about it. Let me add my voice to the multitude that is pleading with you not to quit your job.

Jennifer, it is risky, a very risky take. The sacrifice you want to make for your marriage is risky. It may end well, it may not, but most times, you and I know it doesn’t end well.

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From woman to woman, listen to me. I wish I didn’t leave my life there to move here. We could have tried other things. Don’t get me wrong, I love and completely adore my husband, but love is sweeter and milky when money is inside.

Hmm.

— Asafo Maame

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