I have always known my worth, even when the world seemed determined to send me men who couldn’t see it. I don’t say this to brag, but I am a beautiful woman, the kind of beautiful that makes people squint their eyes for a second look, as if they need to be sure I’m not an angel who accidentally wandered onto the surface of the earth, and beneath that beauty, I have built a solid career for myself in the corporate world where I earn my own good money.

But somehow, despite all of this, the men who crossed my path were almost nothing to write home about, so painfully lackadaisical and nonchalant that it felt like an insult to the woman I was becoming.

I refused to settle, telling myself over and over that those men should go and face themselves because a changing, growing girl like me deserved fire and intention, not the bare minimum. That whole frustrating cycle became one of the reasons I put a deliberate pause on dating until I turned 29, hoping that time would bring something better.

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Then I met Michael, and the very first night he touched me, I got pregnant. When I told him, his response broke me into a thousand tiny pieces, shattering something inside me that I didn’t even know could break.

He told me he was not ready to become a father again.

“I already have a child somewhere. I don’t want to add another one. The economy is not easy for that,” he said.

I was 29 years old, and hearing a man tell me to let go of my pregnancy was painful. He explained that his finances were not good and that he was struggling with responsibilities already. I even offered a solution.

“You can take care of some of the baby’s items. I will handle transportation to antenatal appointments. We can take it slowly and support each other. You don’t have to carry everything alone,” I told him.

I wanted to take his advice, and in a way I did, because he was right from his own perspective, but I was also right from mine.

I knew deep down that I wasn’t getting any younger, so I made the brave decision to have the baby. Throughout the journey, he floated in and out of my life like a ghost, present and absent at the same time, until I finally gave birth and called to tell him, only for him to show up four months later when the child could already recognise my voice even from the hallway.

I didn’t mind. My family made them pay the required customary obligations, but after that day, the responsibilities of raising the child completely fell on me.

It has been seven long years now, and I have stayed completely chaste, focused only on raising and providing for my child without anyone’s help, until he reappeared late in 2025, telling me that his sister wanted to take my son abroad and that I should hand him over, an offer I declined with my whole chest, and since that day he has vanished into thin air again, leaving me to continue the work I never asked to do alone.

Earlier this year, I met Yaw. This time, I wanted to do things differently. So, I deliberately took time in knowing him. We talked regularly, went on dates, and I allowed myself to know him. I knew his middle name, where he lived, and the little details that made him who he was. For the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to be vulnerable again.

Just last month, I allowed us to take things further, and we made love, and now as I speak to you, I am pregnant again. It was supposed to be sweet, the kind of news that brings two people who seem madly in love with each other even closer together, but guess what he said when I finally spoke to him about it.

He said the exact same thing Michael said, that he is not financially up there to add a child to his life, that he has too many responsibilities to cater for. So, I should consider an abortion.

But I am 36 years old now, and I do not feel like this is the time to throw away a child. I know the challenges that come with being a single mother. I know the sacrifices, the struggles, and the loneliness that can come with raising children without support from their fathers.

But deep down, I feel determined to keep this child.

At this point, I feel like giving up on relationships completely and focusing only on raising my children.

I Called My Girlfriend And Another Man Answered The Phone

However, I am confused. I keep asking myself if I am making the right decision by having two children when I may have to raise them without support from their fathers.

Am I being selfish by choosing to keep my babies, or am I simply choosing the life I believe I can live with?

— Aseye
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