I was completely shocked when I saw her text on my phone. From my perspective, everything in the relationship seemed to be going well. We were happy, we were getting along, and as far as I knew, neither of us was cheating or entertaining anyone else. At least, I know I wasn’t. Little did I know that she had been unhappy and dissatisfied with what we had built together. The message ended with the same familiar line: “It’s not you, it’s me.”

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Since the breakup, I have been having a really hard time. I barely eat, I struggle to sleep, and some days my life feels completely empty. I honestly do not know what to do with myself anymore. I will not lie, I am finding it difficult to move on as though I did not spend the last 365 days loving her, caring for her, and making her the center of my world.

Part of me wants to put my pride aside, get down on my knees, and beg her for another chance. Whenever those thoughts come, another voice in my head tells me that I will eventually be okay. But will I really be okay? Or should I involve a third party to speak to her on my behalf so we can find our way back to each other?

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Sometimes I wonder if this is some kind of test, if she is trying to see how much I truly love her, because I genuinely do not understand what happened.

Can relationships come back from something like this, or should I simply accept it and move on? Those who have been through a similar experience, how did you cope with it?

—Kofi

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