If you haven’t read the first part of this story, here’s the link. Kindly read it before starting this one.

The guy in my office started chasing me when I wasn’t married. He was in school and came to work for his brother Whenever he was on vacation. He made everyone around the office suspect that there was something going on between us. My colleagues pushed me to say yes to him; “Look at his family and how wealthy they are, don’t you want to be part of it? Don’t be silly. This is a chance that comes once in a lifetime.” They saw it as a chance but I saw it as a distraction because my husband was already in the frame. We had dated for years and we were getting closer to marriage. I didn’t want to bring a third party into our affair. When the guy got persistent and pushy, I was afraid my husband, who was then my boyfriend, would get to know about it somehow and get angry about it so I told him—I told him about the guy in my office.

“Guess what? Our director’s brother is after me. He doesn’t give me a breathing space in the office, even after work. He even calls late at night just to worry me. I’ve told him I have you but it looks like it didn’t bother him so he keeps coming.” My husband laughed. He called him a loser. He said, “He came too late so he should park somewhere. Does he know where we started? Or he thinks he can get you because he’s rich?” Once he was aware, I wasn’t scared anymore.

I showed him our chats. He got mad sometimes. He screamed, “You’re giving him too much space to think that he can have you. Why don’t you tell him off?” I responded, “Issues of this nature ought to be handled with care. I respect him because he’s our little director. I can’t be disrespectful.” 

Once he goes to school, I give him a wide gap. I don’t answer his calls and don’t respond to his messages often but he didn’t stop. 

He was in school when he heard that I was getting married. He called and broke down on the phone. He asked, “Is it that you didn’t trust me? Or you simply didn’t love me?” I told him, “You already know my answer. This man I’m getting married to had been in the picture long before you came. I couldn’t have left him for you no matter how much love you had for me. It wasn’t going to be possible.” Finally, he told me, “Please don’t stop talking to me. I can be a friend.” I answered, “That’s what I’d always wanted you to be. A friend.” 

I got married. He completed school and travelled out of the country to study. Every move he picked on me, I told my husband about it. Even when he gave me a gift and it was something my husband could use, I dashed it to him. When the guy in my office travelled abroad, I told him and he said, “He should go and never come again.” In his mind, the guy left and never came again because at some point I stopped talking about him. 

When I started going through marital issues, I kept it a secret to myself. When I felt it was getting out of hand, I brought his parents in. I had no child so his parents also gave me cold shoulders. My own parents didn’t help much. To them, every problem I was going through was normal. My mom even told me I was not the only woman going through issues in marriage. My dad added, “Even the pastor’s wife is going through marital problems but they don’t share. They don’t talk about it so you may think all is well. Pray about it. Seek comfort in your problems, once you get a child, everything would come to an end.” 

When my husband went out and came back with a child and I ran to them, they didn’t even show me any pity. When my heart was breaking and I was crying, my mom was there to remind me to go and fight for my marriage. My dad said, “You’re even lucky he brought the child home. Some wives don’t get to know until their husbands die and then the kids come home to fight for property. You know your devil so all you have to do is to get a long spoon and dine with him.” They pushed me back into my husband’s arms when all I needed was healing and comfort.

This is what people didn’t understand when I shared my first story. They kept asking why I didn’t walk away. They are right. I had a job I could fend for myself. I was ready to walk out but I had my parents to impress. I’m their only child and they had invested a lot in me so somehow, I felt I needed to give them that respect. When I went back into the marriage, I went with a heart of reconciliation. I was determined, as my mother urged, to fight for my marriage until they started wiping my face on the floor because I didn’t have a child. It wasn’t easy for me to go to the guy in my office for comfort but everything he said to me at that time was comforting and it was the reason I fell into his arms again. And I didn’t seek to justify anything. I was only sharing my truth because I felt I needed a space to rant. 

I think I was six months pregnant when one Saturday morning, Ebo rushed into the bedroom and asked me to stay indoors. I asked, “Who’s after you? Why are you panting?” He answered, “Just stay inside. Don’t come out.” Two women walked into our hall, followed by Ebo’s mother. It was later I realized that those two women were the lady my husband gave birth with and her mother. I was in the chamber but I could hear everything they were talking about. Ebo had neglected their child so they had come to talk things over. I heard the lady saying; “Maybe you think if you send us money I’ll use the money on myself. Or it’s your stupid wife who’s poisoning your mind. I’m tired of chasing you for upkeep money so I’ll bring the child to come and stay with you.”

Ebo responded, “You can bring her. Bring her and we’ll take her in so you stop pestering me for money.” I wasn’t going to remain in the chamber while they take a decision that would affect me so I came out and told my husband, “No, she’s not bringing her child here to come and live with us. I don’t have the energy to take care of a witch’s daughter.” She had rained insults on me all the while they were there. I called her a witch and she got up to start a fight. She thought I was going to chicken out because I was pregnant. I faced her. Things escalated quickly. Before we knew it, we were in a tussle. Ebo stood in front of me guarding my tummy while this lady attacked my face. The two mothers were there screaming at us to stop fighting.

There’s a mark under my left eye as I write this. I got it from the girl. After that fight, I told Ebo, “This is it. I’m tired of this marriage. Now that they know our home it means they would come at any time they want. I’m leaving and would never come back here again.” He was also angry at me; “Why did you come out when I’ve given you clear instructions to stay inside? What if she hurt the pregnancy? Do you want to kill the baby you’re carrying?” I said softly, “It’s obvious. You don’t care about me. I’ll leave before you people connive and kill me.” 

I went back to my parent’s house and again they were on my neck to go back. That got me infuriated so I told my mom, “You people are the reason why I’m in the mess that I’m in now. I’m not going to keep listening to you. One day I’ll die and you’ll walk around my casket and tell me to wake up and go to my husband. That won’t happen.” When they kept piling pressure on me, I told them the truth. “I’ll go back and tell him the truth and I know after knowing the truth he’ll come here and divorce me so I’ll have my peace.” They asked what truth and I told them, “He’s not the biological father of my child and I can prove it. Even what I’m carrying now doesn’t belong to him. Now I have a reason for him to leave me, right?” 

At first, they thought I was just saying anything to escape the marriage. My mom isn’t educated. My dad has some level of education, just enough to understand what DNA is. I told them about the DNA. I told them about the affair with the guy in my office and how it started. When they asked if the guy knew about it I said yes and they both screamed, “Jesus!” I was so fed up that I wanted to lay all my armour down and surrender.

My dad said, “You’re not going to say anything to him and this marriage is going to continue until you know what to do. You won’t bring us into this shame with you, never! I didn’t raise an evil daughter like you. No, I didn’t.” My mom was crying as if she was in deep pain. Their worries didn’t affect me in any way. If I was evil then they planted the seed of evil in me. My mom will come to my room every day asking if I was sure about what I was saying. She asked what I was going to do and I told her. She asked, “And then what?” I answered, “I don’t know.” She asked if I wanted to bring the other man home, I said I wasn’t ready and I wasn’t sure if he would accept to meet them.” 

Ebo kept pressuring me to return home. I told him I didn’t want the marriage again and nothing would send me back to him. He said, “You’ll be happy to be a single mother of two kids?” That question got me so infuriated I told him, “I’m not going to be a single mother so think about yourself.” He didn’t understand it and I wasn’t ready to explain it to him. 

The guy in my office was also there. He didn’t know what was happening but from the rate at which I was calling him, one day he asked if everything was fine. I told him, “All is not well but I’ll talk about it after delivery.” He asked, “Is it about us? Your husband has found out about us?” I answered, “It’s about everything. We’ll discuss it and see the way forward. I’m tired and want an escape.” He was anxious but I kept him in the dark until I delivered. By the time I delivered, Ebo had gone for his daughter and was living with her and was waiting for me to come back to take care of them. From the information I gathered, the mother of his daughter visited often when she realized I was gone from the house. I wasn’t even bothered about them. My whole being had left the marriage so I didn’t care what they did together.

Two months ago, I met the guy in my office. He looked at me sternly while shaking his head as if he didn’t believe what I’d told him. I said, “Yeah, you’re the father of the first one. For the second one, I hadn’t done the test but it’s also yours. I know because I’m the mother. If you doubt me, you can do it yourself and find out.” He kept breathing heavily while looking sternly at me. He wasn’t even blinking. He asked, “So what do we do?” I answered, “We don’t have to do anything.”

“How about your husband? Does he know?” 

“He doesn’t know but I’m leaving him.”

“And then what?” 

“And then nothing. You can come home tomorrow and claim your kids and it wouldn’t bother me.”

He said that my composure confuses him. Sometimes he doesn’t believe my story because according to him, I’m too calm for someone going through such a problem. But I tell him I’ve had so much drama that I don’t care anymore. But He’s scared and confused at the same time. He kept asking me what we have to do. Again, he kept telling me to exercise patience until he was settled on what next to do. 

READ ALSO: My Side Chick Expects Me To Keep Talking To Her After She Broke My Heart

Not too long ago, he said something like he wanted to relocate abroad and later come for me, and then we announce it. The thing is, I don’t want to marry him. What I’ve seen in marriage is enough for a single lifetime. If I run from this, I will be my own woman, work hard and live life on my own terms. At least, I’ve been married before and I know how marriage is like. Let those who haven’t married before also taste it and judge things for themselves.

He’s the reason I haven’t told Ebo anything as of now. Currently, I’m listening to him and the plans he has. My husband insists on me coming home so we could be one big family. He is using my parents to get at me but he has realized that my parents are not pulling their weights as they used to so now he’s confused. I’ve told him to concentrate on his child with the other woman and leave us alone. 

He comes around to see us. He comes empty-handed and tells me until I come home he won’t give us anything. As I said earlier, this marriage is over and I’m currently building the pieces of me from the inside out. I accept that it would be hard when things blow up eventually but I’m ready. I’m not a soft woman to let things of this nature bring me down. Society would call me the woman who got married and had kids with another man? They’ll point fingers at me and condemn me like people did when the first part of my story was shared? What else can they do? 

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I’m ready for them. They are not the people who went through what I went through so they’ll never understand. I will forgive their ignorance and ignore their judgment. When this is all over, I will live life again the way I wanted it and to me, that’s the beauty that would come from the ashes when this whole thing catches flames. 

—Betty

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