My girlfriend has been my first love and my everything. And I mean that figuratively and literally. She was my first kiss, my first shuperu, my first tight hug, my first of everything. She is the person I love with everything in me, from my head to my toes, with every fibre of my being. When it comes to our relationship, I have never cheated on her, but she has cheated on me twice.

The first time it happened, I asked her for an explanation. Since everyone knows what they are doing, I wanted to dig deeper and understand the reason behind her cheating in what I considered an almost perfect relationship. She answered, “It is because I was curious, wanted to know what it was like, and I was influenced too.”

I listened to her attentively. Sometimes, we become too greedy and give in to temptation, so I chose to forgive her.

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The second cheating happened just recently, and it nearly sent me into the psychiatric ward. But I am a man. I gathered all the strength in me, swallowed the pain, and forgave her again. The reason I got so angry was that she offered herself so cheaply to the guy she cheated with, while I have always treated her like the crown upon my head and the very essence of my life.

She changed all of a sudden. She started restricting my access to her phone, deleting her messages and call logs. The guy she cheated with didn’t even give her the attention she needed. He disrespected her on top of everything. Apparently, he got to know her weaknesses and took advantage of them.

When she was confessing the truth, I sat down and looked at her. In my head, I kept asking myself, how could a church girl behave this way? What was wrong? What exactly are they teaching in churches these days?

I wanted to leave the relationship because, to me, what she had done was complete disrespect. The night I decided to call it quits, I heard a voice telling me to remember everything she had done for me in my life and forgive her. Yes, she has played a vital role in my life, and because of one special thing she did for me, I made a very difficult decision. I chose to forgive her and give her another chance. So yes, I have forgiven her wholeheartedly. Did my girlfriend cheat? Eeei, no. Never.

I have never cheated on her, and I don’t plan to. Not because I don’t have the capacity to cheat, but because she has been of great help to me and has been very good to me in many ways. She now has this fear that I will cheat on her in retaliation, but I have no intention of doing that. I will not seek revenge either.

It has always been my belief that cheating is for the weak. If it happens again, I will simply walk away and find someone who will cherish me better.

For now, we are back to how we used to be, happy and making plans for the future. But there is one thing left holding our relationship together: trust. And that trust is hanging by a thread. If she lets go of what little remains, I will call it quits.

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She cheated, but I stayed. People might call me a fool for staying, and I might even agree with them. But there is one thing I know for certain: I will not be a fool for a third time. In all of this, I have learned a few things. First, never assume that your woman can never cheat on you. Second, in my next life, I will never go near any “church girl” type again. There are different kinds of danger in this world, only that they come dressed in holiness.

—JEREMY

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