My boyfriend is a virgin, or holy, or whatever name we give to men who haven’t done it before. We don’t get intimate, we don’t even try, and I really like that for us. It’s good for where we are right now.

FOLLOW US ON WHATSAPP CHANNEL TO RECEIVE ALL STORIES IN YOUR INBOX

Aside from that, we go out on dates now and then and have good fun. We talk, we laugh. He is very wise, he tells the funniest jokes you’ve ever heard, and he’s straightforward too. Plain, if you like. Some days he gets flirty with me, and it’s all quite funny.

That isn’t my problem at all. Here is the problem.

In the beginning of our relationship, he did not allow me to visit him at his house because he didn’t want anyone to know he was dating. At least, that is the reason he gave when I asked.

He has a calling in the church. It means the hands of God are on his head. He is anointed. Our church is heavy on chastity, so sometimes when he behaves a certain way, I try to understand where he’s coming from.

Recently, he got injured and was admitted at Korle Bu. He asked me to come visit him at the hospital. The first day I went, I saw his mom. He introduced me as his friend. I wasn’t offended. I was chill. It remained like that until he was discharged. Throughout his stay, when I went to visit, he would constantly badger and nag about the people who were affectionate publicly at the hospital, saying they had no shame.

When he was discharged, he wasn’t really fit. So, as a good girlfriend, after I closed from work, I would take a car to his house, which is almost two hours away without traffic, to go and see him and help him out. During weekends I slept over and helped, and that was the only time he introduced me to his mom and aunt as his girlfriend.

READ ALSO: He Wants To Marry Me When I Haven’t Seen His ‘Thing’ in Action

Anytime I visited, he wouldn’t allow me to put my slippers at his doorstep. He would tell me to put them far away from his door. I asked him why, and he said, “What people don’t know cannot be destroyed.” When people visited him, he would ask me to go take a walk. According to him, a lady was pregnant at his church and was publicly humiliated because of it, so he doesn’t want any of his members to know I was his girlfriend. You see, there’s no correspondence to it.

I could be sitting close to him and chatting, but the moment he hears a knock from an outsider, jack, he has changed. He would ask me to get up and go sit somewhere else, as if I were the devil or a weapon formed against him.

I’m having mixed feelings. Is he behaving like this because he’s a virgin? Or does he have someone else? Or is he scared because he has a calling? I understand a private relationship, but secrecy isn’t something I’d sign up for.

Is There A Perfect One Out There For Everyone?

Has anyone been in this kind of situation before? How did you go about it? He’s in his early thirties. I believe he should know better, or am I not being reasonable? The moment he met me, he said he would marry me. Getting married in our church isn’t so difficult. That’s why I don’t think he’s cheating.

We met last year on December 26. We are barely a year old, and this is how he’s always been. Is this how he’d treat me if we were married?

—Tricia

This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at [email protected]. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.

#SB<>