Before I left Ghana for my master’s degree in London, almost everyone I spoke to warned me about how lonely life in the UK could be. They told me people were too busy working to make time for relationships.

One of my friends, who had been living in London for five years, told me, “My sister, if you are expecting men to chase you and call you the way they do in Ghana, forget it. Here, everybody is looking for money. You can stay in your room for three days and nobody will even know you’re alive.”

We laughed about it, but she wasn’t joking.

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I was twenty-seven and had just ended a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere. To be honest, love wasn’t part of the agenda.

I arrived at Heathrow on a cold September afternoon. It was my first time travelling outside Ghana, and everything felt unfamiliar. The airport was huge, people were moving quickly, and I was struggling with two big suitcases, a smaller bag, and a backpack.

I had packed as though London didn’t have shops. My mother had filled one suitcase with food items, and I was carrying clothes I probably didn’t need. To make matters worse, one of my suitcase wheels had broken. Getting the bags through the airport was a struggle. I was wondering how I would manage the rest of the journey.

That’s when someone approached me.

“Madam, are you moving the whole of Ghana to London?”

I turned and saw a young man smiling at me. He asked if I needed help. I was initially reluctant. I had been warned about trusting strangers, especially in a country I didn’t know. But the bags were embarrassing me, and I was exhausted.

I thanked him and allowed him to help. His name was Daniel. He was Ghanaian and had been living in London for several years. He had come to the airport to see someone off and was heading home.

He asked where I was going. We were travelling in the same direction for part of the journey, so he offered to accompany me to the station where I needed to change trains.

He carried my heaviest suitcase and helped me navigate the station. Along the way, he asked about Ghana, my university, and how I was finding London.

I told him I hadn’t even spent three hours in the country, so I didn’t know what to think yet. He laughed. Before we parted, he helped me move my bags to the right platform and made sure I understood where to get off. Then he asked for my number.

He noticed my hesitation and said, “Don’t worry. I’m not asking you to marry me. I just want to know you reached safely.”

I gave him my number. That evening, after struggling to arrange my things in my small room, my phone rang. It was Daniel.

“Madam Ghana, have you reached?”

He asked whether I had eaten and if everything was fine with my accommodation. We spoke briefly, and he wished me a good night. The following morning, he called again. By the third day, he had called so consistently that I jokingly asked whether he didn’t have work to do.

He said, “I work, but that doesn’t mean I can’t check on someone.”

Remembering what my friends had told me about men in London, I found his behaviour interesting. When I complained about the cold, he laughed and told me I hadn’t experienced anything yet. When I struggled to understand the transport system, he explained things patiently. He also introduced me to a Ghanaian shop where I could buy some familiar food items.

What made me comfortable with Daniel was that he didn’t demand to see me or become offended when I was busy.

A month after I arrived, he asked if we could meet for lunch. I agreed. After that meeting, I started looking forward to his calls.

My studies became demanding, and there were days I felt overwhelmed. I was trying to adjust to a different academic system while worrying about money and my family back home.

One evening, after a particularly difficult week, I broke down while talking to him. I told him I was tired and beginning to question whether coming to London had been a good decision. The next evening, he came to see me with food. We sat together, ate, and talked until I felt better.

Our friendship continued for several months before he told me he wanted us to be more than friends. I liked him, but I had promised myself I wouldn’t allow a relationship to distract me from my education. I also wondered whether everything would change once we started dating but I threw caution to the wind and said yes to his proposal.

I remembered how I had been warned that relationships in London were difficult to find and even harder to maintain. Yet here was someone making time for me despite his busy schedule. It wasn’t always easy, but I never had to beg him to acknowledge me or wonder whether I was important to him.

He was at my graduation. He was the only person there I could look at and call mine. No family members. No friends I grew up with. Just him.

A few weeks after my graduation, I told him I wanted to travel back to Ghana.

He asked, “For what? At least stay and get a job first.”

I told him, “I want to visit my mom and show her my degree. She hasn’t seen it.”

He burst out laughing.

That evening, he called me and asked, “When are we leaving for Ghana?”

“We?”

“Yes, because I’m going with you.”

This is someone who had travelled home only once since he moved to London. He bought our tickets and planned the whole trip to a T as if it had been his idea from the beginning.

We went to Ghana and visited my house first. While we were eating, my mom kept looking at us and smiling. Later, when we were alone, she reminded me of what she had said before I travelled.

“I told you God could give you your master’s and a husband. You doubted me. Now tell me, what is this?”

I laughed and told her not to start.

The day before Daniel was supposed to leave, he told us he would be back in a week but three days later, he came with his father, his uncle, and an elderly man. The elderly man told my mom, “We hear there’s a beautiful flower here. We didn’t come with a knife, but we are ready to cut that flower.”

We were in Ghana for thirty-three days, and within those days, we did the knocking rite, had a traditional wedding, and also had a church wedding. I asked him, “Aren’t we moving too fast, doing things we didn’t plan to do?”

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He answered, “You didn’t plan it, but I did.”

Today, Daniel is my husband, and his kids call me Mom because I carried them for nine months. Sometimes, when I’m struggling with grocery bags and he comes to help me, I tease him that carrying bags is his life’s calling, but he missed it.

Before I left Ghana for my master’s degree in London, I prepared myself for loneliness but right at the entrance to my new life in London, love said hello and loneliness ran away from me.

—Dora

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