When my elder brother was getting married he asked me for a loan of GHC5,000. He came with his wife-to-be to ask for the money. The day I asked him to come for the money, he came with his wife-to-be and once he took the money, they left my premises. I didn’t see him again or hear from him again until a couple of days before the wedding, I called him and asked if the wedding was coming on. He got angry; ”Why are you asking me this stupid question? Are you one of those witches working against my wedding?”

Wow, it was just a harmless question and I put it that way because I didn’t see an invite flying around or any of our siblings talking about it including my parents. I apologized for saying something I shouldn’t have said and asked, “What time is the wedding coming on?” He responded, “If you come to the premises of the church, you’ll know.”

When I talked to my other siblings, they also seemed not to be aware of what was going on. It was only my dad who knew the time of the wedding because he was the one going to sign the certificate. We attended the wedding as if we were strangers. The family of the woman was at the helm of every affair. When my sister asked me to join the queue for food, I declined. Later, she came back angry because of how she was treated.

The one serving was from the lady’s side of the family and I could have sworn she didn’t know any of us that was why she treated my sister that way. I was there for the closing remarks and when it got to the point my brother was giving his vote of thanks, he didn’t mention any of his family member’s name. Not even my dad but he mentioned his wife’s family by name and thanked them for their contribution.

I thought I was the only one who noticed. My mom did and she drew the attention of the rest to the whole issue. Everyone gave their opinions and how they experienced the wedding. I told them, “The good thing is we were there. We didn’t abandon him the way he abandoned us. Let’s wait and see, maybe there will be an explanation later.

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Months later, there was nothing. I didn’t expect any better but I was expecting him to pay my money so I gave him a call, “Sammy, I’ve waited to hear from you concerning the money but I haven’t heard anything from you. When should I expect it?” He retorted, “If I had the money, do you think I wouldn’t have paid? You’ll hear from me when I get it.”

He hung up the call without listening to anything further from me. I got angry but I didn’t react. When the month ended, I called and he gave me the same reaction. Before he hung up I told him, “Maybe you should tell me when I should expect you to pay so I don’t call you when you don’t want to hear my voice.” He screamed, “Didn’t you hear what I said? When I get the money, you won’t have to call me. I will bring it myself.”

I reported the issue to my parents. They were angry I gave him that much money. My dad was like, “He treated you the way he did at the wedding after giving him that much? That’s cold. Collect your money, whichever way you can.”

My dad’s approval was everything to me so the next time I wanted the money, I went to his house. He wasn’t there. His wife received me very well and called him that I was there waiting for him. I heard him shouting, “Tell her to go. Why are you entertaining her? She knows I will pay when I get the money.”

I snatched the phone from his wife and told him, “Sammy, the next time I come to your house, it won’t be pretty. I don’t know what any of us have done to you that you don’t want to hear our voices. The only reason I keep coming for you to insult me is my money. You better pay before you see the worse side of me.”

He felt I was joking so the next time I was going, I went with two guys just in case. He was about to show macho when I told him, “I brought these guys for this same reason. If you don’t pay my money, I swear, I will leave with everything in your room that’s worth a penny. You think you’re crazy? I gave you time because you’re an elder brother but not this time.”

When he realized I was serious, he calmed down. He told me he didn’t have the money and I couldn’t squeeze what he didn’t have from him. So we went inside and started taking off his TV. He was so shocked he started smiling and asking what I was doing. His wife was visibly pregnant. She came to hold my shoulder and pleaded with me not to do it. She handed me GHC3,000 and told me to call back when the month ends.

I left with the guys. In the evening my dad called me to come home. When I went, he was there with my mom and my dad and one uncle of ours. He said I’d disgraced him in front of his wife and neighbours and that he wasn’t going to forgive me. My dad said, “This is what your brother is saying. What do you have to say?” Before I could say anything, my uncle asked me to apologize to bring peace. I didn’t blame him. He didn’t know the genesis of the issue.

I looked into my brother’s face and asked, “Do you have the rest of my money or your wife is not here so you can’t pay? You won’t forgive me? As in, your forgiveness “makes rich and adds no sorrow?” After today, you can tell the world I’m no longer your sister, I don’t mind but before that, pay what you owe me.”

One dawn, I got so angry I wanted to go and display in his house but a voice in me said, “You’re angry because you love him so much but he didn’t reciprocate the love. You’re just hurt but don’t hurt him. Don’t hurt the thread that binds you as a family.”

Somehow, I felt a pinch of regret for everything that had happened. I took my phone to text him in the morning only to realize he had blocked me. I called his wife. When she answered she said, “Please the money is not ready. Kindly give us some time. I will personally pay you.”

I asked if my brother had a problem. She told me he had been going through a lot even before they got married. Their wedding nearly didn’t happen had it not been for the amount I gave him and the contribution from their church. My brother didn’t have a job. It was the woman who was keeping their ship afloat.

I told her not to tell him that I called and also told her that I wasn’t taking the money again.

If I could turn back the hands of time, I would have acted differently. He’s my brother and I love him so much but guess what, he says he would never forgive me and I should not get close to his family again because he doesn’t know me. I only want to help him but before that, I want us to iron out our differences. He’s the one who doesn’t want to see me now. I want to forget about him but when I think of what his wife told me, my heart breaks.

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My dad says I should ignore him. My mom thinks he’s being a silly egoistic man so I should forget about him but what if something bad happens to him and he doesn’t tell me about it? That’s my fear. How do I get my brother back? I showed him shege but he’s all I have; four girls and him.

—Sammy’s Sister

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