In my first year on campus, I got heartbroken by my first ever girlfriend, Sandra. I had given my all to the relationship, but it ended in disappointment. The breakup affected me deeply. For almost three months I was inconsolable. I thought I wouldn’t get over it but eventually, I healed and moved on.
I used to be the kind of guy who believed in being faithful to one woman. All of that changed after my heartbreak. I became protective of my heart. I didn’t want to commit to anyone seriously and get hurt. However, I had sexual needs. So I started engaging in casual sex with different ladies just to satisfy my needs.
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When I finally decided to enter a relationship again, I found a beautiful lady, and we started something nice. Linda and I enjoyed all the good things love had to offer. We had a few misunderstandings here and there, but we always managed to resolve them. I felt truly happy to have her as my girlfriend.
The problem began when I met Vanessa. We were just friends at first but eventually, she became someone I was interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with. I didn’t tell her I had a girlfriend. Rather, I proposed love to her. You should see how happy I was when she agreed to be with me. It was as if I didn’t already have someone who loved me.
Neither of the ladies found out they were two. I kept this up until I lost interest in my main girlfriend and broke up with her.
I didn’t break up with Vanessa, though. I made her my serious girlfriend. I was sure it was just going to be the two of us until I began dating another lady secretly. Amara was everything I thought I needed.
Just like the previous time, I lost interest in my serious girlfriend after I started seeing someone else on the side. Thus my relationship with Linda also ended. After that, I promised myself that I wouldn’t look at any other woman apart from Amara. She became my main girlfriend.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t stick to only her. This cycle has become my life. When I am dating someone, I can’t stick to only her. I end up cheating, and then the “main” relationship ends.
Just two weeks ago, my six-month relationship with Cynthia ended. I tried so hard to be faithful to her but I couldn’t do it. Getting to the end, I was seeing someone else behind her back. Now, I’ve started another serious relationship with Dora, the person I was cheating with.
Today, I sat down to reflect on my life, and honestly, I feel devastated. Is this what I’ve become? What happened to the man who once believed in commitment and loyalty?
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I keep asking myself if this is because of the heartbreak I went through years ago. Could it be that I never truly healed from my breakup with Sandra? I don’t want to use that heartbreak as an excuse for my actions, but I can’t help wondering if it’s the root cause.
I don’t want to be the kind of man who keeps hurting women because I can’t keep it in my pants. So I want to know how I can break this pattern. Maybe someone here is a retired player and can give me advice on how to change and stick to only one woman going forward. I need all the help I can get.
—Bobbie
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#SB
Retired player…. Maybe Ibrahimovic coz Ronaldo is still banging goals evn at 40+. But on a serioos not get Sandra arrested she the root of your malady.
Look beyond sex and look for true friendship. Try friendship first and bond truly and spiritually. Sex becomes an icing on the cake. And even when you’re sexually distracted that bond will keep you in check and survive the relationship.
Bro you don’t need any retired players advice but you need to do self assessment and ask yourself what you want? Whether you want to have fun in relationship or serious relationship that may lead to marriage.
And bro don’t joke with the problem you are facing, it more spiritual than physical.
First you need to change from having sex with ladies you hook up with.
Secondly you need deliverances because a sexual spirit has taken over your strength that even if you get the lady of your dreams you will still sleep with the next lady you see because it no longer you in control.