I didn’t call him a womanizer. That word came from his own mouth. I asked a simple question. I asked that question because it was something that was eating me up. I wanted a clarification or let’s say, I wanted him to tell me I was wrong but when he opened his mouth he said, “So you see me as a womanizer, right? Because I’m in a relationship with you doesn’t mean every woman should be ugly in my eyes.”

This is how we got here.

I’m dating this guy for the past four months. He’s generally giving and caring so I try to overlook his shortcomings but this one became a daily thing and it started getting to me.

We are friends on Facebook so I see his activities a lot often on my timeline and each time I see him, he’s commenting on photos of ladies, calling them beautiful, sexy, “Hey I like your lips, it looks like…” Then he’ll leave it there until the poster would comment and ask, “It looks like what?” Then he’ll respond, “Check your inbox.”

He does it in groups we are both in. He’s here on Silent Beads and each time he comments, he comments under the comments of pretty ladies saying he agrees with them or saying something like, “This is the best comment I’ve read today. You’re very intelligent. I’ll come here and read your comment often.”

He’s all about making other women look good so he could get into their spaces. I thought of it for a while and decided to talk about it since it was bothering me. I asked, “You give a lot of compliments to women outside but I’ve never had one from you. That’s not even a problem but don’t you think these women may think you’re hitting on them, judging from how you say it?”

Is there something wrong with the way I asked this question?

Bɛma bore. That I’ve called him a womanizer. That I’m insecure. That he has every right to compliment other women and I can’t do foko. He left and I haven’t seen him again. He doesn’t pick up my calls. He texts to tell me to leave him alone.

I Will Change My Views About Sex | Silent Beads

What is wrong with this question that he should react this way? I hope he reads this and I hope he reads the comments too. If I said it the wrong way, I don’t have any problem with apologizing but if what I said wasn’t wrong, then man, mend your ways and stop using anger to cover up your inadequacies. Grow up. Thirty-two is not an age to play this kind of play.

—Lulu

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