
We’ve dated for almost a year. I never knew he had a hidden name. All this while, I thought his surname was Arthur. I call him Arthur. I know a few friends who also call him Arthur. I didn’t know people call him Arthur because that family name is hard to pronounce and funny to hear. You meet his siblings and they call him by his household name. No one ever mentions that name, but it’s hyphenated with the Arthur.
The first time I saw it, I was shocked. I tried pronouncing it and the name didn’t allow me to pronounce it. I twisted my tongue and adjusted my jaw, but it still came out weird and incorrect. He laughed. He said, “Stop spoiling my name.”
I asked, “So this is your surname?” He answered, “Yeah, but because people can’t pronounce it, they stay away from it.” I asked, amidst laughter, “So when we marry, I won’t be Mrs. Arthur but Mrs. This-Name?” He asked, “Is it too heavy for you? Don’t worry, you won’t carry it around so it won’t hurt your neck.”
But it’s hurting my feelings. I can’t imagine my little kids bearing this heavy name. They’ll crumble under the name. You know today’s kids, their friends will try all they can to call them by this name, a name even angels fear to mention.
Is There A Perfect One Out There For Everyone?
Apart from this, he comes from a part of the country that my parents will ask a lot of questions about. I’m not saying they won’t agree to me marrying him, but the questions will be longer than necessary, and his surname makes it so obvious that that’s where he comes from. Arthur…Arthur hides everything, but the last name brings it all out into the daylight.
Am I petty to want to break up with him?
—Efia
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My dear, just walk away if you think you can’t handle it.
Don’t push yourself into something that may cripple you in future.
Yes, you are petty
And also you have made up your mind already so leave. You’re just here to test the waters
If you stay, it will still bug you and create problems down the line.
PETTY,, yes you’re.
I hope one day you won’t cheat on your future husband with “this name” because he is not treating you like “this name”
There’s no word or name you cannot pronounce if you pay attention . Your excuse is just too flemsy . People learn and speak a whole language or dialect let alone ” word ” . Abeg Park one side .
Are you leaving a good relationship because of a name?what abt the ones with good names yet won’t treat you well
Dear Afia,
You are not petty. You are just considering everything about your future before you enter. Back in high school I had a senior with a northern surname. You attempt to mention it at your own risk but he was good and a gentleman. Guess what…? The surname helped him win a prefectorial position. Attached his wedding, her southerner wife said she got scared of his surname but later found a ‘brofolised’ way to call it and by God’s grace, its been glorious. Your fears are legit but you can work around it. No one really cares about others though coming to think of surnames. They start teasing you when you are young and it stops. Be open Afia. If he is right for you, dont make the scary surname push you away. If only the comments above and mine didnt come too late, you will come by later in years to come and laugh with us.
Just for jokes: People with Mensah surname kraa go break your heart plus set it on fire🤣.
We love you❤️