I always give one hundred and one percent in relationships. There is nothing I have been taught to do to keep a man that I haven’t done. I cook. I clean. I even offer financial and spiritual support when there is a need. If we were in the days of old, I would have been tagged as a wife material because I have it all. However, in this day and age, I seem to not come anywhere near what men are looking for in women they want to settle down with.

Despite all my best efforts, I am currently a single mother with no hope that I would find a man who wouldn’t leave because I have a child. There are men who make it clear to me the moment I mention that I have a child that they don’t want a born-one woman. There are those who say things like, “It doesn’t matter to me that you have a child. I like you and I want to see where this goes.” I would give them a chance only for them to tell me later, “I am sorry, I am not okay that you have a child. I thought I could get on board with it but I can’t.”

I wish I could say this happened once or twice, but with the kind of luck I have when it comes to relationships, I have lost count of the number of times it has happened. There are men who stick around for very long and make me believe they are here to stay. The next thing I realize is that they are ignoring my calls and text message. It has been years since I was in a stable relationship. Everyone who comes ends up leaving.

“Why do these men keep leaving?” I have often asked myself. I know that I don’t ask them for money. I work, and when I need to do things that I am unable to afford, my family steps in to support me. So the men I dated cannot say they left me because I expected them to take care of me or my child. If anything, I am the one who offers them financial assistance. The only thing I have ever asked these men is their time and attention.

Somewhere in November last year, a male friend of mine started giving me the attention I so very much craved. We were just acquaintances until he started calling me regularly to check up on me. Soon enough I started reciprocating the favor. That’s how we got close. He visited me at home a few times and I enjoyed his company each time. The more I got to know him the more I got to see how nice he was. He was my ideal man. He understood my needs without my need to tell him. We spent a lot of time together and he was always attentive to me.

We even talked about getting intimate. Sometimes we made jokes about the subject. Other times we discussed what we would do in the event of an unplanned pregnancy. The kind of conversations we had gave me insight into the kind of man he was. And I was so happy that he fully embraced me and accepted me as a born one.
”Two years ago I asked God for a man who will love and accept me despite the fact that I have a child. And now he has brought me Gaisie, a man who has showered me with love and affection. Thank you God for answered prayers.” This was my prayer of thanks every morning I awoke to see Gaisie’s “Good morning” texts.

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He gave me hope that relationships could be nice and peaceful. He called me several times a day and texted me when he was not busy. We made video calls and did all the nice things you can think of. It was a time of bliss. By the time he asked me to be his girlfriend, I was already melting at his feet. I asked him three times if he was sure of what he was asking. I told him about all the challenges of dating a single mother and how it could strain relationships sometimes. He said, “I know what I want so don’t try to scare me away. Are you going to take this leap with me?” I said yes and he was happy.

We made plans to go on a trip one weekend. We just wanted to get away from the city and spend some time together, just the two of us. We agreed that he would come to my place on the Friday of the trip and we would go together. When the day arrived he called to tell me, “There is a party at my office. I didn’t plan to attend but I have been asked to M.C the event. I promise I will close early so we can go on our trip.” I said okay, and waited for him.

My Husband Enjoys Watching The Nakedness Of His Mother–Beads Media

I didn’t hear back from him so I called at 8:00 PM. He told me he was leaving the party soon. That was the last I heard of him that day. I called and texted but all of them went unanswered. The next day he sent a text checking up on me as if nothing had happened. He didn’t apologize for the day before. He didn’t show remorse that we made plans and he couldn’t honor them. All I wanted him to say was, “Sorry, I couldn’t show up last night.” But he couldn’t say it. He just wanted to carry on smoothly but I was too hurt to allow that. I had also seen too much relationship drama to sweep something like this under the carpet.

I didn’t say anything to him but I decided to walk away. And he watched me leave without stretching out a hand to catch my falling heart. I wanted to give him my best and I did. But Gaisie broke my heart. Surprisingly, this is my first heartbreak and I am twenty-nine. I have decided to give up on love and just focus on my child because I believe love is not for me. If it was, I wouldn’t have suffered this much. I don’t know if Gaisie will get to read this but I hope he does. And I do hope that someday I heal and fill the vacuum he left in my heart.

–Maggie

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