Five years into our marriage and still without a child, we became a couple in distress. We were already stressed when our marriage was only two years old and a child wasn’t coming. She took herbal medicines while I remained hopeful that things would be alright. After three years without a child, we started seeing a doctor. The amount involved was enormous, but we both saved to go through the process and get the medication we needed.

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A year later, nothing had happened. We no longer had the money to continue pursuing medical treatment in that direction, but we were relieved to hear that nothing was medically wrong with either of us. I listened to friends and the pressure from my family. My friends said I should try having a child with another woman and see what will happen. My mom identified a girl from my hometown and told me to try with her. She was a virgin, so my mom was convinced she would get pregnant.

The only question that remained was, “After I get another woman pregnant, what happens to my wife?”

My mom said my wife would know the problem was hers, so she wouldn’t leave the marriage. My friends said I could keep the child a secret for as long as I could.

The lady my mom introduced to me was Nana Aba. I started talking to her. Because of her, I visited home often. She knew I was married but didn’t really care as long as I took good care of her. My mom was even the one taking care of her before I got involved with her. Whenever I went home, she would come and spend time with me at the house before leaving.

Aside from Nana Aba, there was Dorcas. She also knew I was married, but she loved me nonetheless. She didn’t know what was going on in my marriage. I saw her after work or on some weekends. She was a great cook and loved feeding me, so on weekends she would invite me over, cook for me, and then I would also satisfy her in bed.

A few months after I started dating Nana Aba, my mom called to tell me she was pregnant. Our relationship wasn’t even five months old. I asked how, and my mom answered, “This is what you get when you deal with a fertile woman.”

I wasn’t happy, and I wasn’t sad. The feeling I thought the pregnancy would bring never came. I wasn’t excited. Maybe if it had been my wife, I would have been happier. I told my mom to keep it a secret from the rest of the family. I sent money whenever I could. Even when I couldn’t, my mom took care of Nana Aba.

Three months after Nana Aba became pregnant, Dorcas also announced her pregnancy.

She said, “What if I gave you your first child?”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

She answered, “I checked. I’m pregnant. I don’t know what you’re going to say, but I want to keep it.”

I told her she couldn’t because I was a married man, and it would be difficult for me to be there for the child. She asked, “How can you reject what you’ve always wanted? If it were your wife, you wouldn’t have a problem. You know I’m not a child.”

We argued about it for over a week. She insisted she wanted to keep the pregnancy.

“Even if you don’t want to be part of it, that’s fine. But don’t tell me to get rid of it.”

She spoke more from emotion than logic. She was thirty-six, and according to her, life wasn’t waiting around forever. I didn’t agree with her decision to keep the pregnancy, but it was a decision she made on her own.

I was a confused man. What should have brought me joy was turning my life upside down.

Then one early morning my wife screamed from the bathroom, “Yiee! This had better be true. This had better be nothing but the truth!”

She came out holding the test kit. The two red lines were brighter than neon lights. They were almost blinding.

While she was jumping up and down with excitement, I sat there, overwhelmed by confusion, asking myself why I had rushed outside when I had been so close to getting what I wanted at home. Within six months, I had gotten three women pregnant. Where was I going to get the money to take care of all three?

My mom said, “You have to be concerned about your wife’s pregnancy. It may have come from outside. How was she able to get pregnant now after five years?”

I thought it through. My mom was only planting seeds of doubt in my mind. When I told her I had no reason to doubt that the pregnancy was mine, I don’t think she liked my answer.

Just a day later, my wife found out about Nana Aba and the fact that she was pregnant and living with my mom.

She cried as though I had beaten her. She still hasn’t told me where she heard it from, but I know my mom had something to do with it.

As I write this, there’s fire in my marriage. The only explanation I gave was, “I was scared we were never going to have children, so I tried it outside.”

She’s angry and is fighting it out with me, but I think, as the days go by, she’s slowly beginning to accept what has happened.

My confusion now is whether I should tell her about Dorcas or let that one remain in the dark. She’s already hurt, and knowing about Dorcas would hurt her even more. At the same time, maybe it would hurt just once so we could both move on and heal together.

Some days, something tells me I should tell her. But then I look at how broken she is when she should be celebrating her pregnancy, and I feel telling her would only add selfish pain to her burden.

I Called My Girlfriend And Another Man Answered The Phone

So I’m keeping it to myself, all the while asking myself why I brought such a mess upon myself. Three babies by three different women. How am I going to manage on this salary? Maybe this is my punishment for not waiting on the Lord.

Hmmm.

—Arthur

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