One of the ground rules we laid when we started dating was that we would abstain from shuperu for as long as possible. We were not necessarily waiting to get married before we do it. We just wanted to build a strong foundation without the complications that shuperu sometimes brings to relationships. While I was honouring the terms of our agreement, Kumi was busily dipping his stick into other women’s honeypots. The first time I caught him he was the perfect picture of sorry. He grovelled, he cried, and he said it was the devil that possessed him to do it. “I promise I won’t do it again,” he pleaded, “Just give me another chance to right my wrongs.”

They say no one is perfect, and that you cannot get one hundred per cent of what you want in a partner. So I took his infidelity as his flaw. As long as he has assured me that he wouldn’t do it again, I was willing to let it pass for us to start afresh. But then again, not everyone knows how to make good use of a second chance. Shortly after I forgave him, he went ahead to cheat on me again. This time when I caught him, his excuse was, “What did you expect to happen? I am a man with needs. You are the one who proposed that we should have a chaste relationship. I agreed to it to make you happy but it doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t find someone who will also make me happy.”

How he switched from remorseful and apologetic to someone who was boldly defending his actions surprised me. Yet I was determined to make the necessary sacrifices to make our relationship work. So on our two-year anniversary, I gifted him with my cookie. I believed if I let him have a taste of it, he wouldn’t have any reason to go out there sampling whoever made theirs available to him. And truly, he changed. He let go of all his playthings and decided to only focus on me. I monitored him closely and never found anything to make me suspect that there was someone else. So I became very convinced that I was truly his number one. Boy, was I wrong? A cheat is a cheat. There is nothing you can do to make them faithful. Unfortunately, I learned this lesson the hard way.

There was a girl he introduced to me as his friend. She was the one he was keeping on the side. I never suspected that there was anything between them until I caught them red-handed. I suppose the best way to hide something is to keep it in plain sight. I decided that I was done with the relationship after that particular lady. However, Kumi wouldn’t let me go. “I know I said this the last time but this time I am serious. I will not cheat on you again if you give me another chance.” “I have already come this far with him,” I thought, “Maybe, this really is the last time he will do this. Let me just give him a little more time to prove his worth.”

One day we were having a conversation when he asked, “Why don’t you do house chores when you visit me?” I remember asking him, “Do you expect me to visit you at your parents’ house and do chores for you and your entire family?” “Yes,” he replied, “To be honest with you, my parents don’t like you because of the way you just come and go without lifting a finger to dust, sweep the compound, or do anything to show them that you will be a good wife to me.” I told him I wouldn’t do any wife duties until I become a wife. My answer did not please him but we left it at that.

Late last year, I got pregnant with his baby. Immediately I told him about it he said, “We can’t keep it.” I didn’t want to get rid of it but he was hell-bent on us not having the baby. His sister was the one who prescribed the pills I used. After the deed was done, I felt so guilty that I got depressed. He also became completely withdrawn from me. This made my poor mental health worse. And I started smoking in an attempt to cope with everything that was going on. He got upset when he saw me doing it once, so I apologized and never did it again.

READ MORE: I Overheard Him Telling His Sister That I Don’t Give It To Him Enough

We became close again after the whole smoking thing. He acted like a good boyfriend and I was very happy about it. Then I travelled to Lagos this January to sort out some family problems. One week after I travelled, Kumi lost his father. We were physically apart but I was there for him emotionally, and mentally. However, he became withdrawn again after a while. He wouldn’t pick up my calls and only replied to my texts after long hours. When I complained he told me, “Babe, it’s not my fault. I am busy making my father’s funeral arrangements.” I couldn’t tell if he truly was that busy or if he was just using that as an excuse to avoid me, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

On 13th February, we were chatting on WhatsApp when I asked him, “Babe, do u know tomorrow is valentine’s day?” “Oh, really?” he said, “I completely forgot about it.” I asked him, “How can you forget such a day?” “I have been stressed since I buried my father,” he answered. I understood his situation but I still asked, “What are you getting for me though?” In response he sent me a video captioned, “She is beautiful but she smokes.” I didn’t understand why he would bring up something I had stopped doing. When I asked him why he did that, he shouted at me and said things that implied that he hadn’t gotten over my smoking phase. I apologized again for my past, but he just ignored me.
Would You Allow Your Partner To Go Through Your Phone?–Beads Media

What I didn’t know was, this guy went to my best friend and told her, “You are the reason for all my failed relationships. If you had agreed to be with me when I asked you out, I wouldn’t have faced all these troubles in my search for love.” I suppose hearing that bit of information propelled me to my breaking point. To think that the entire time he was with me, it was my friend he wanted got me shattered. I called him and broke up with him. He couldn’t even hide that he was happy we were finally breaking up. After our call, he posted a series of statements on his status basically detailing how his father warned him against me but he didn’t listen. I am so broken that I threatened to kill him. If I knew that this is how things would turn out, I wouldn’t have sacrificed so much for that son of Lucifer.

–Favour

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