It was Valentine’s Day. I told my girlfriend I wasn’t coming home. She spent over an hour on the phone, begging me to come. “It’s our anniversary. We need to celebrate it. Which boyfriend will leave his girlfriend alone and lonely on their anniversary?”

I told her I was busy. I told her work was taking me away. I begged her to understand me. We hang up the phone with an air of heaviness between us. I was lying. I wanted my visit to be a surprise. I used two days to gather all the gifts I was sending to her. I had customized jewellery with her initials on it. I was going to blow her mind.

Friday after work, I set off to meet the love of my life. I got to her door and knocked. It was around 10 p.m. I was smiling a lot. I was imagining things; how the night would be and how the candlelight would stay up all night. I knocked again and again until I heard voices from the room. A guy’s voice and her voice. They were both wondering who it was. Later the guy came to open the door. He was wearing only his boxers. I pushed him in and saw my girl lying on the couch naked.

I had a home but I couldn’t go there. I went to the station and spent the night there, crying and cursing the stars. “It’s all my fault. Why didn’t I tell her I was coming?” I learned to forgive her but the relationship was never the same again until it collapsed.

I heard my colleague planning a surprise visit to his girlfriend. It was her birthday. I told him, “Godwin, if you love your woman and want to keep the relationship going, please tell her about your visit.” He told me telling her would spoil the fun. “It’s her birthday and I want to surprise her.” I told him what happened to me. He laughed at me. He said, “All women are not the same.” All week, I told him the same thing; “Godwin, tell her.”

He went without telling her. It was late at night. His girl told him she would sleep early since he wasn’t coming. When he got there, he opened the door with his spare key. His girl wasn’t home. He was determined to keep the surprise going so he went to bath and went to the bedroom and slept naked waiting for his girlfriend.

At midnight, his girlfriend came home with her sugar daddy. They didn’t go to the bedroom. Right in the hall, they started doing it. That was when he walked in on them. He was also naked. He started shouting and screaming like a madman. The man ran out and drove away. My friend tried to chase him while naked.

When he returned and saw me, he started screaming, “Heeerr women are Babylon, I swear. I will finish this girl. I swear I will make her life miserable.”

He swore like a man whose heart was on fire. I asked, “How old were you together?” “Four,” he answered. I told him, “You can forgive her if you still love her. It’s possible.” He screamed, “Like I’m a madman. Forgive who?”

What One Lesson Did You Learn From Your Dad?

He has been crying since. He doesn’t go to work. He stays home and sings dirges for dead love. We came here to work. He might lose his job but he doesn’t mind. He’s losing his mind. It’s fresh, he’ll get over it but my only fear is him losing his job when all is said and done.

Godwin, please let’s go to work tomorrow, wai. Women will come and go but your career is forever. Listen to me and let’s go to work tomorrow. Godwin!!

—Eddie

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