We have two children. If I had listened to and obeyed my wife, we wouldn’t have had any of our children. She was either not in the mood or was too tired to do it. I had to do it regardless while she fought me off and complained about me not respecting her feelings.
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We’ve been married for eight years and she has not initiated even once. I always have to initiate it, and she always complains about it. We’ve never kissed since marriage. We’ve never done anything involving TLC even when we are alone.
Recently, it has gotten worse. I try to initiate and she fights me physically. A few days ago, she grabbed me between her armpit and pressed my neck until I begged her to release me, all because I made a move after we had gone weeks without intimacy.
She doesn’t say anything in particular apart from blaming me that I want it too much more than she can afford to give. It wasn’t like that when we were dating. It wasn’t superb, but it was way better.
I’ve had reasons to believe she has been seeing another man. She dresses very well when stepping out, but in the house she keeps herself in a way that makes her undesirable to me. So I told her, “I will get another woman and I swear when I get the one I want, this marriage will be over.”
She recorded my voice while I was saying this and sent it to my dad. I told my dad everything that led to that statement. My wife looked my dad in the face and denied the truth, saying she gives it to me anytime I want and that it was just one time she couldn’t do it and I made that threat.
To me, this single act makes me believe my wife is on an agenda to starve me emotionally and destroy me. Based on this sole reason—the fact that she recorded me and sent it to my dad—I want to walk out of the marriage. It feels very personal and it tells me something bigger is coming if I don’t walk away.
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We talk about walking out as if it’s an easy thing, but when it comes to actually doing it, it becomes another story. I’m asking, is this worth a divorce? I’m no longer talking about the emotional starvation. I’m talking about the recording and the lies. Is she not up to something?
