My wife was accused of stealing company money and was arrested. She had been working for this company for five years without any incident. She handled payments and deposits. She was found to have embezzled close to GHC90,000. From the audit, that amount didn’t disappear in one day. It was something that happened over a stretch of time.

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When I bailed her out and brought her home, I asked questions—questions that every husband in my position would ask. “Did you steal the money?” She said no. She said she might have lost the money through transaction errors. I said, “What they found doesn’t look like that was how the money went missing, and you know it. Just tell me the truth so we know what to do.”

She confessed that she indeed took the money as a loan with the intention of repaying it, but when she needed more and more, she went back and took more, thinking she would pay it back before the major audit.

I was stunned but calm. I asked what she did with the money she “borrowed” because, in all our lives as a couple, such an amount of money had never been reflected in our lifestyle. I give her housekeeping money monthly, I pay the kids’ school fees, I pay the utilities, and I even give her money for her personal upkeep when the need arises.

“So what did you use the money for?”
“I can’t recall. It didn’t happen all at once, so how can I recall everything I used the money for?” she answered.

She’s not a forgetful woman. This is the same woman who can bring up the wrongs I did ages ago to make a point today. How could she not remember what took place over the last couple of years?

I asked if she was saving to travel. She laughed it off. “Travel to where?” she asked me. “Or are you asking if I’m building a property somewhere that you’re not aware of?” She laughed that one off, too, and told me it’s a calamity that has befallen her, so I should help her out.

Her company wants assets as collateral while we make monthly deposits until we can pay off the amount owed. The only property we have currently that qualifies as collateral is a piece of land we are building on. She has not invested a penny in the building, but since I’m doing it, it’s for her as well. I don’t mind using that as collateral, but I’ve told her that until I know what she did with the money, I’m not going to do that.

How can such a huge amount pass through your hands and you not know what you used it for? I’ve looked everywhere, searching for signs of that money in her life. She doesn’t own a car. She doesn’t own any expensive clothes. She doesn’t live a luxurious life or bring home exotic things. The phone she uses currently is one I bought for her three years ago. She hasn’t even changed the case that came with it, so how did she spend that money?

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She thinks I’m joking, but I’ll let her go to prison without batting an eye if she doesn’t tell me what she did with that money. Her parents have been calling every day, asking her to at least remember one instance where she used a large portion of that money. She keeps telling them the same story that the money came and it disappeared, as if she lives with spirits.

Am I being inconsiderate with my stand?

—David

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