My mom and my dad got divorced nine years ago after going through a turbulent marriage for years. I think it all started when my dad got the maid pregnant. We called her Aunt Comfort. She was very kind to us, especially when my mother wasn’t around. She would do all the house chores, including ours, so we loved her very much. When mom traveled and we were alone with her, all we did was eat and sleep.

FOLLOW US ON WHATSAPP CHANNEL TO RECEIVE ALL STORIES IN YOUR INBOX

I returned from school one day and she was gone. It was my mom who broke the news to me, and judging from their body language, it was obvious they had fought about something. I didn’t ask questions about it until much later, when I heard that Aunt Comfort had left with a pregnancy.

I thought some of the guys in our area had gotten her pregnant, so I was shocked. I remember asking my brother, “When did she go out to get pregnant? She was always in the house.” My elder brother—maybe he knew details I didn’t—shouted at me and told me to mind my business. From that point on, my parents’ marriage was never the same again.

There was a fight every single day, and I’m not exaggerating when I say every single day. Each fight made things clearer as to why Aunt Comfort left. Mom found a way to sneak the issue into her arguments until one day, right in front of the three of us, she blurted out what they were trying to hide from us. She screamed at my father, “I left you just for a few days and you got Comfort pregnant, but you want me to believe you?”

That fight lasted for weeks. My mom left the house. Dad was a troubled man. He would disappear in the morning and come back in the evening. Maybe he went to meet my mom and begged her to come back—I’m not sure—but he was very restless.

Then one day, my dad came back from work and met an empty house. My mom had taken us with her and left. We went to live in her parents’ house for days until we saw dad again. There were always family meetings in that house about mom and dad. The reason my mom left? Aunt Comfort had given birth, and dad had traveled to see the child, which fueled my mom’s anger. They tried to settle it, but my mom decided she wouldn’t return to the marriage.

So for nine years, we lived life between the two of them. I loved my mom, and growing up, I came to understand her better because I’m a woman. She asked me to learn from her story. She tried her best with me, while my brothers stayed in the care of my dad. My dad loved me too, and I loved him as well. Even when we were living with my mom, he ensured we got whatever we needed.

We all got the education we needed and soon left the house to begin our own lives. My elder brother traveled abroad. My second brother got a job out of town. I stayed with my mom even after school until last year, when I got a job and moved out.

In December, when we visited my dad, he told us he was going to marry again. My brother teased, “At this age, you won’t find a corner and stay? You want young girls to play with your heart?” My dad replied, “This isn’t a young girl. It’s someone you already know—Comfort.”

“You’re going to marry Comfort?” my brother asked. “Do you want mom to commit suicide?” My dad laughed. I smiled. They had been divorced for nine years, but dad going back to marry the reason their marriage ended felt like a slap in the face. I told him to reconsider his decision, but he’s just a man, and men don’t easily change their minds in situations like this.

I didn’t tell my mom, but somehow she found out. She called one evening and said, “Have you heard your dad is going to marry Comfort?” I pretended it was my first time hearing it. I said, “Huh? Dad is going to marry again? For what?”

She ranted and ranted and finally said, “If you step foot there to support him, you are no longer my daughter. I will pray you go through the same pain your father caused me so you understand my anger.” I asked, “Are you cursing me?” She replied with a question, “Are you planning to go?”

She called my two brothers and told them the same thing. To my brother abroad, she adjusted the curse slightly: “If you send him even a pesewa to support this nonsense he calls marriage, you will receive your share of pain. I won’t say much, but don’t try me.”

I thought my mother had healed and moved on because for the past nine years she had lived happily and unbothered. Why should this hurt her so much that she would curse us?

My dad is looking up to us for support. He wants us there to send a message that even his children support this new marriage. My brother has already said he’s not attending. He said he will turn off his phone that day until the marriage is over.

Thriving In A Relationship When The Man Doesn’t Have Money

I feel sad for my dad. He needs us, but it feels like we’re turning our backs on him. He says he doesn’t want to die lonely. He wants someone by his side to the end, and since his former affair partner isn’t married, he didn’t look elsewhere. I understand him to a point, but I also understand my mom. She would feel betrayed by our presence.

So I ask: which side should I choose—my mom’s or my dad’s?

—Selly

This story you just read was sent to us by someone just like you. We know you have a story too. Email it to us at [email protected]. You can also drop your number and we will call you so you tell us your story.

******