For three whole years, not a single man looked my way. Not one. I wasn’t hiding indoors ooo. I met men, spoke to men, laughed with men. I even became extra friendly with the few I genuinely liked, hoping they would see through it and make a move. But nothing happened. It was as if I was invisible. Even the ones I made it embarrassingly obvious that I liked pretended not to notice. For three years, no man ever called to even ask my name. That thing humbled me.

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At a point, I nearly proposed to a guy called Jay. We had known each other for only two weeks, but loneliness can push a woman to do foolish things. Just when I gathered the courage to shoot my shot, the man casually dropped, “I have a girlfriend.” The heartbreak I felt wasn’t because I loved him but because I was desperate. I honestly began to believe my ex had cursed me. Especially when I remembered how he said, “You’ll never get someone like me.” I thought he meant I would never find a man again. I prayed. I fasted. Because how can a whole three years pass and not a single soul would even say hello?

Then Jude came. Out of nowhere. He proposed and before he would even complete the sentence, I said yes. I was tired of wilderness. I was ready to force love to work if I had to. But strangely, after saying yes to Jude, men suddenly started seeing me. All of a sudden, my appeal resurrected. Men who had ignored me for years now wanted to give me gifts, send money, and chase me like their lives depended on it. I was getting proposals left and right even though I kept telling everyone I was taken.

Ato even had the audacity to ask me to date him on the side, saying he might be the one destined to marry me. Fortunately, Jude and I married before our second anniversary, and I thought that would put an end to these men.

But no. After marriage, everything changed again. The gifts stopped. The favors stopped. Even when I genuinely needed help, the same men who once chased me now asked, “What is your husband doing?” As if marriage automatically means you lose the right to ask anyone for help.

But one thing hasn’t stopped. Men still chase me. Married with a fresh ring and men still propose to me boldly. One even told me, “Married people are not happy. We know.”

Is There A Perfect One Out There For Everyone?

When I mentioned it to Jude, he didn’t find it amusing. He said, “It’s the devil testing you. Or a curse from your family.” That part scared me because I know where I come from.

Now I’m wondering, do other married women go through this, or my case is some kind of spiritual attack?

—Eugenia

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