My boyfriend and I are fighting because of a post he made: “Men are likely to fall in love with women who have similar behaviors to their mothers.”
So, I started a conversation about it and asked him, “If that’s what you’re saying, then what behaviors do I have that are similar to your mum’s?” Instead of answering, he started telling me all the ways I’m different from her.
He said, “When we have issues, you’re always ready to be done with the relationship. But when my mum and I have a misunderstanding, she can’t sleep until it’s settled, and that makes me feel loved.”
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He also said his mum is transparent with him. According to him, I’m transparent too, but “not like her.”
He also said I don’t make decisions on my own. When I asked him to give examples, he wouldn’t mention any.
Then I asked him what made him think I’m not transparent. He said I hide my emotions, that I’m respectful but very stubborn, while his mum is humble. He even said he loves his mum so much and hopes that one day I’ll become like her.
I replied by telling him that we’re different people. I’m my own person, and we play different roles in his life. I tell my boyfriend everything there is to know about me. I tell him how my day went, what’s happening in my life, and how I’m feeling more than I tell anyone else. If that is not transparency, then what is?
He still said it again, “Your heart is not clear like my mother’s. I can’t see through you the way I can see through her.”
I Called My Girlfriend And Another Man Answered The Phone
Seeing as this is my first relationship, this has taken a toll on me. I have given this relationship my all.
Well, I didn’t take the matter any further because I didn’t want to hurt myself. But the things he said have been weighing heavily on my mind.
— PEACE
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Peace, you seem not to like peace o. Leave that relationship ASAP. Comparison with his mom will drain you. You will always never be enough and you will lose yourself ie if you haven’t already. We are all unique in different ways. He should go and find his mom’s match and marry since you are not.
He is trying to gaslight you. Just remain being yourself as long as you’re doing what is right. We all have different personalities and comparison is the thief of joy. You’ll always be up against it in this relationship.