I come from the other side of Africa, the southern side. My life experiences have been such that I count myself among the blessed women. Not only because I married an amazing man, but also because of where I come from and all that I’ve been through in life.

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I’m the seventh child in a family of eight. With both parents unemployed and living in a struggling economy, life was tough when I was a child. I still wrestle with low self-esteem because of how much I was mocked growing up.

I also battled various health issues. When I became a young adult, the sickness worsened. As if that wasn’t enough, I lost both my parents within a year. Two years after their untimely demise, I suffered a serious heartbreak. All of these misfortunes made the illness worse. It would cripple me for months at a time.

At one point, I thought I was going to die. That was when this wonderful man came into my life. His name is Dali. I met him in a public transport. Even as friends, I often wondered what he saw in me.

I was at a place where I was certain I wasn’t good for anyone, especially with that sickness hanging over me.

Dali proved that I was worth it. He would visit me during my worst moments and take care of me. I didn’t think we would go beyond a platonic relationship until the day he expressed his love for me. He had just come out of a relationship I knew about. I felt one month was too soon for him to move on already. What if he was using me as a rebound? 

Despite my reservations, Dali surprised me. Nothing he did showed our relationship was a joke to him. He took me very seriously.

Public healthcare is practically non-existent in this part of the country. Regardless of his own financial struggles, he sacrificed a certain amount every month to register me on medical aid. On some of our dates, I would be too sick to meet him, so he would come over and spend the day with me. 

We dated for two years without intimacy because of our faith. I remember our wedding day. I sat for most of the ceremony because I was too weak to stand. I was worried my sickness would ruin the day, but he kept assuring me we would have a beautiful day. Truly, the day passed without a hitch. The photos came out beautifully. 

Months after our wedding, I had another serious episode. My family wanted to take me in to nurse me back to health, but he refused. 

“When I vowed I would love her in sickness, and in health, I meant it,” he said to them. 

For three months, I was down. Dali did everything around the house. He always made sure he cooked for me before leaving for work. He would even come home during the day to make sure I had eaten. We fought hard, but the illness came and went. 

Every year, I’d be bedridden for two or three months. Eventually, visiting doctors became pointless. We were never able to determine the root cause. Our faith and trust remained in God.

When we decided to start a family, he was filled with fear. He was scared he would lose me during pregnancy. But I wanted children. It was a risk I was willing to take.

From that point on, our story shifted from battling illness to battling infertility, or maybe both. People say men change when you can’t give them children, but I don’t know if mine is just a man or an angel in human form. We endured seven painful years of infertility.

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Through prayer and medical intervention, we finally conceived.

Ironically, pregnancy became the cure for my strange sickness. We may never understand it, but yes, pregnancy made me well. Now, two children and ten years of marriage later, we’re still going strong. I’m not fully healed, but I’ve never felt better. He makes sure I don’t strain myself. He always ensures I have help, and he’s very hands-on with the kids.

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I don’t know what tomorrow holds, but for now, I’m happy. I’m content. He has never given me any reason to doubt his loyalty. We rarely argue, and when we do, it’s over minor things. He has been my greatest gift and living proof that true love exists.

Today marks our anniversary, so I am sharing our story here to let him know how much I appreciate his commitment to me, our marriage, and our family throughout the years. Happy anniversary, my love. May the years be filled with more love, joy, and happiness for us!

— Monalisa

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