If you haven’t read the first part of this story, here’s the link. Kindly read it before starting this one.

We survived a year together. It didn’t happen by accident. She loved me and I also loved her so it was natural that we would keep going. The noise didn’t go away, the chaw-chaw-chaw and the gona-gona sound kept coming each time she ate in my presence. A year later, she was still struggling to eat in my presence. After sharing my story, I took my time to go through all the comments and I was happy with what everyone said. The bottom line was for me to remain patient because it wasn’t going to take just a day for her to stop. 

She was trying and I saw the effort. She would go loud and later go silent. I didn’t say anything. I pretended I wasn’t checking on her. I wanted her to manage her own demons on her own terms and she was trying. When she came to visit me and she told me she had eaten, I begged her to eat mine with me. Whenever we went out, I playfully put food in her mouth just to let her know that I’m ok with the way she eats. With time, she stopped hiding and started feeling comfortable eating in front of me again but as I said, the noise didn’t stop and the sound from her chewing got louder at some point.

One day I was on Facebook when I saw someone’s post about this same chewing problem. This time it was rather a woman who was complaining about how her husband embarrasses her with the way he eats in public. I tagged her in the comment and said, “Can you relate?” I added laughing emojis and waited for her comment but she didn’t come to say anything. I felt she hadn’t seen it and would comment when she finally sees it but she never did until in the evening I sent her a message and asked what she had been up to. “It seems like you’ve been busy today. You ampaa haven’t been on Facebook today. What have you been doing?” 

She read my message and didn’t say a word. I knew something was wrong so I called. She said, “How may I help you? Don’t you see it if someone doesn’t want to talk to you?” I was at a loss. I kept asking what I did. She told me she wasn’t ready to talk so I should leave her alone. That evening I went to her house and she wasn’t around. I called and she didn’t pick up. I was getting anxious. I sent a long text message explaining why I tagged her in the post and asked her not to see it the wrong way. She called. There was anger in her voice. She told me, “You see I didn’t tell you why I’m angry but you’ve been able to figure it out? It means there’s malice in what you did. I thought we’ve gone past that episode of our lives so why tag me in a post to broadcast to the whole world that I’m just like the man the poster was talking about?”

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She wouldn’t listen to my explanation. She concluded I tagged her in the post just to make a mockery of her. In the end, I asked her, “So what are you saying? How long are you going to remain angry about something this small?” She said, “It’s obvious you won’t let me be. I’m the only girl in this world who was not trained to eat well. To you, I’m a villager and deserve to be mocked in public. That’s all right, continue mocking me. I will leave you alone so my existence doesn’t continue to embarrass you.”

For a week we were still fighting about this same issue. At a point, I concluded she was just looking for a reason to leave and I gave her a straw to hold on to. I decided to leave her alone. I was letting her go but I couldn’t stop thinking about how something this small could break us apart. I will pick up a phone to call her and I will stop midway, hoping she would call and say something to me. Two weeks later, we were still not talking but she was watching my status every day. The day I decided to block her on Whatsapp was the day she called me. She said, “I’m only checking up on you. Hope you’re good?” 

“How can I be good when you’ve allowed this to come between us? People have gone through worse and still survived it so if you could allow this to come between us then I don’t know the kind of future we could have built together.” She was quiet and was listening to me. I stopped talking to listen to what she had to say. She was quiet. I asked, “Won’t you say anything?” She answered, “I’m still thinking. I’m sorry if I got it wrong but the whole eating thing made me feel insecure. A friend made a joke about my eating style and I haven’t spoken to her since. It was Ok when I didn’t know about it. You brought it to my attention and all my life, I have to think about my surroundings before I can even drink water. Maybe I overstretched it but it’s not altogether my fault.”

I apologized once again and she responded, “No problem. I understand you want the best for me but have patience with me. I will work on it. You don’t have to remind me all the time that a problem of such nature exists.”

We came back together and since then, I’ve closed my ears to the chewing sound and have closed my eyes to how she handles food once it gets into her mouth. I have to give her credit too. She had been consistently working on it. Sometime she would call me while chewing and ask me, “Is that how it’s done? You don’t hear anything right?” I will laugh and say, “Feel free and do you.”

My Friend With Benefits Is Pregnant For Me But That’s Not The Issue–Beads Media

We’ve survived two years together. August was our second anniversary. I asked where we are going with the relationship and she answered, “Wherever good you want to take it, I’m ready. You’re the man. Decide and I will follow.” So we started talking about marriage. Plans are currently far advanced. We know where we want to live and have started looking for accommodation there. I’ve met her family and she has met mine. We are slowly putting one and one together to get to two.

I’m happy I didn’t let go. Like someone said in the comment when I first shared my story. She said, “Love is patience…” I’m happy both of us exercised patience to be able to get to where we are now. I would have lost a diamond if I let her go. And because of her, I’ve learned a big lesson that true love doesn’t always come covered in perfection. Sometimes she may be a princess. Sometimes she may tick all the boxes. And sometimes, she may come gulping down her drink gona-gona to irritate the life out of you. We are capable to love anything and everything if only we can exercise patience.  

–Kelvin

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