My boyfriend and I have a lot in common. This has made us compatible in a lot of ways, but when it comes to our sex drives we are polar opposites. He is the type who doesn’t get tired easily. He could go for several rounds before getting satisfied. I on the other hand get tired after I finish. Once I do, I just want to sleep. And after every encounter, I wouldn’t be in the mood to do it again for about a week or two. Because of this, I mostly turn down his advances when he comes over. He has always understood when I turned him away so I thought everything was fine.
For the nine months we have been together he has made me happy. I believe that in all my experience in the dating world, this is the only time it feels right. He is the only man who makes me feel like I belong with someone. I love the way he makes me laugh all the time. I love how he pushes me to be better in every aspect of my life. He is not insecure about my success. He knows how much my career means to me, and he encourages me to climb higher. In fact, the first time I met him was on a flight back to Ghana after I had gone on a business trip. So we mostly discussed my work that day.
I don’t know if he was impressed by the work I do or by my passion for the work because he asked me out to lunch. It took us months of spending time together to finally start dating. I knew that he was good for me before I even agreed to be his girlfriend. And everything he has done to this point has been great. That is why I started thinking about discussing marriage with him. We are both in our thirties so I didn’t see any point in having a long relationship.
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However, before I could bring up the topic he told me; “I want you to meet my sister. When are you free for us to go?” I was really excited when he said this. To me, it meant he wanted to take things to the next level. So I fixed a date and we went. When we got there his sister was welcoming. I could tell that my boyfriend looks up to her, just from the way he sought her opinion on everything we talked about. I saw it as a good sign. There is a saying that a man will treat you the way he treats the women in his family. So I suppose I liked how much respect he showed for her.
After we finished eating, his sister insisted that I rest while she and Matt clean up. I didn’t want to be rude so I agreed. I heard the two of them talking in the kitchen. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but they were louder than they intended to be. I heard everything they discussed without even straining my ears. They were talking about me. His sister told him that I am a nice girl, and he agreed. He went on to say good things about me. I was smiling and feeling good about myself until I heard him say, “But there is a problem.” Then he delved into the problems we have in the bedroom. He told her, “Because of my past experiences, being with her makes me feel shortchanged. She doesn’t satisfy me.” His voice was laced with frustration.
Apart from how weird it felt for him to talk about our intimate affairs with his sister, it was her response that bothered me. “If she doesn’t do it for you in the bedroom then I will advise you to break up with her now. If not, you will end up cheating on her when you get married.” He didn’t say anything after that. He was quiet on the way back from the trip. And he hasn’t said anything to me about our shuperu affairs since we’ve been back. I also don’t know how to bring it up without looking like I eavesdrop on their private conversation.
What Women Do When They Are No Longer Interested In You–Beads Media
I love Matt very much, and I want us to get married. But I am concerned that he might leave me. I get that he loves doing it, and he is good at it, but is shuperu so important that it can end a beautiful relationship like ours? I talked to my best friend about my fears and she advised; “If you know you can’t fully meet his needs then give him permission to step out occasionally with one of these hook-up girls.” I know she means well but her idea is a terrible one. So I am asking the readers on this platform to give me better ideas on how to save my relationship. I am beginning to feel desperate.
–Bernice
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#SB
Give you hubby all you get, why are u you being selfish ? Otherwise someone will do your business which you are failing
Sis, just up your game and enjoy your relationship. After all, he is your love so you should be willing to please him to avoid losing him. PERIOD
There are so many ways to get both of you guys satisfied. I think not only sex can satisfy a man. I think communication also does. Since both are dodging talking about sex and sex drives, there are going to be problems all over.
Set a home date and talk about sex and how both can get satisfied one way or the other.
Your guy could bring up something you guys can work around. Relationship is all about sacrifice. So both can sacrifice to get on board. Before you get married to him, have that talk about sex.
Let me give u a personal expirience and it will be in 2 parts.
1, i like sex. Very very well. I was worried I may not meet the long time needed in bed with a woman, may be I will be a 2min man. I started masturbation, i also trained myself to hold back a little when i want to come. I also thought myself how not to get too high in lost when doing it. And when it comes to real life I became good, i last long. This masturbation I did it for years. To what end, i became good in bed. Every lady I meet, they tell me am good. I trained. Train yourself. Sex in marriage is a mighty thing.
2, the woman I married is just like u, we discussed it and she improved a little. She came with styles and tricks to doing it.
Develop yourself you can’t run away from it. Watch porm movies. Sorry if am crazy. Don’t lose any man for failing in your bedroom duties.
I experienced the same thing and used to fight my boyfriend all the time even though the problem came from me. Then I started using the gym regularly and working out, now I am the one chasing him. It’s all in the mind sis. Change your diet, talk to a therapist, work out. But whatever you do, don’t loose a good guy because of this. If you don’t work on it, it will become an issue in subsequent future relationships. I wish you the very best.
Sweetheart, you need to try and satisfy him more. Ask you said, you’re in your thirties, and this is the best guy you’ve had so far. You don’t want to lose him just because of this. Find a way to bring up the issue, without letting him know you overheard them speaking. Tell him you’re willing to give him more. You should even try and initiate sex a few times, Some guys are really excited by that.