I was seventeen when I said yes to a man. He found me by accident but when the relationship had to end, it ended with casualties. I don’t know who sustained the biggest injury to the heart but you can guess when you get to the end of the story.

I’m twenty-one years old now so this happened not too long ago. I was in school—at SHS when a call came through my phone one evening. I asked who it was and he screamed, “You mean you don’t know who is speaking, Alice? You’ve deleted my number?” I politely responded, “Please this is not Alice. Sorry, it’s a wrong line.”

He said sorry and cut the call immediately. A few minutes later, he called again. He asked, “You’re sure you’re not Alice? This is the number I used to call her on when I was in Ghana. I’ve checked and it’s correct.”

I didn’t know what to say so I apologized once again and dropped the call. He texted, “I feel you’re pulling my legs. This is James. I’m sorry I ignored you when I left the country. I’m here to make it up to you.”

I didn’t respond to the text so he called. He was like, “Why are you doing this to me? At least give me listening ears first.”

I wasn’t Alice and nothing could make me Alice that night and I proved it to him. He said his final sorry and he disappeared. A couple of days later he called. He said, “I’m no longer looking for Alice. It’s you I called to talk to. I believe people meet for a reason. There are no accidents in life. There was a reason you picked up the call. Let’s investigate the reason.”

He proposed friendship and I accepted. I told him I was in school and even told him my age so he wouldn’t get anything twisted. He didn’t mind and insisted on being friends so I accepted him. He called often and we talked, especially in the night because we were not supposed to keep phones on campus.

One day he told me he had a gift for me and would like to visit and give those gifts to me. I gave him my details and he came around the next visiting day. He didn’t look as old as I figured. He said he was thirty-five but he looked normal. He also saw me and couldn’t believe I was seventeen. “You’re only seventeen and you’re looking like this? Tell me it’s a lie.”

He handed over a bag to me, later said goodbye and I rushed to the dormitory. The things I found in the bag made my heart leapt for joy. All forms of groceries, perfume and an envelope containing money. I called him and thanked him profusely. Days later he said he had fallen for me.

“Eiii, I’m a kid oo. Did you hear my age?”

He answered, “You’ll be eighteen very soon so I want to catch you young. It’s a distance relationship too so it’s going to be safe. Nothing to fear.”

Honestly, I felt saying no to him will make him stop bringing gifts and I also felt there was more where that came from so I wanted to explore. I said yes and added; “As far as it’s going to be safe, I don’t have any problem.”

He visited every visiting hour. Even when I vacated and was going home, he came for me, gave me money and took me to the station. That was the first two months of the relationship. On my eighteen birthday, he got me an iPhone and a wristwatch. When he visited the next time, he brought me a necklace and sneakers. This guy was turning out to be a dream I never had.

And then he started talking about sex and asking me to send nudes. “James, I thought you said it was going to be safe? Where you’re taking me to currently isn’t safe grounds.” He insisted so I found a nice way to put his request away. I told him we share beds so I can’t take such photos. He told me to do it in the bath. I told him we bathed in batches. I pleaded with him; “I will complete school very soon. Let me go home and send you whatever you want.”

I was smart. I wanted to complete school, go home and ignore him completely.

A few weeks before I completed school, he asked me to come and spend a weekend at his place before I go home. He wasn’t asking. He was demanding it. He started talking about all the good things he had done for me and the fact that I had not given him anything in return. I told him, “I’m a child. What else can I give you at this point in my life?” He didn’t say anything.

One afternoon I was told I had a visitor. I knew it would be James so I took my time to dress up before I stepped out to meet him. He saw me and he smiled. He said I was looking beautiful and I said he was looking good too. Immediately we sat down, he said, “Don’t do gidigidi. Just sit still so you don’t create a scene. He snatched the phone he gave me and asked me to take off the sneakers I was wearing.

I thought he was joking until he started talking at the top of his voice to draw attention. When I bent to take off the shoes, he reached for the necklace and tear it off my neck. He said, “You said you’re a child, that’s ok. These things are not for children. When you grow up, call me and I’ll bring them to you.”

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Some guys were on the side watching us. I begged him to allow me to go inside the dormitory and take off the things for him. He said, “You think I was born yesterday? You small girl you want to use big brains to outwit me. Take them off before I create a scene here.”

I took the shoes off and he tear off the watch on my wrist too. He put them in a bag he was holding and said, “I’m not going to do anything to these things. Come for them when you grow up. You think you’re wise.” He quickly turned and started walking away. The guys there started talking among themselves and started laughing.

When I started walking barefoot to the dorm, they followed me, calling me ashawo and saying, “When we propose to you girls you think we are small boys. You want sugar daddies. You see your end?” Some even hooted at me until my girls came to meet me, held me in their embrace and whisked me away.

I had only a few weeks to complete school but it wasn’t easy for me on campus. It became news. Everyone had a different version of what happened. Some even said I was dating a married man, a man old enough to be my father. I was the talking point everywhere so I remained in my bed for days and cried.

I called James one morning pleading with him to return my chip because my parents were going to call me. He said, “There was a Momo message yesterday. I saw the notification and saw the amount in your account. I know that money too is also mine. Give me the password and let me withdraw before I bring you the sim.”

That day, I quickly went to town, got a new sim and withdrew my money.

My Husband Looks Like A Cheat On Me |Beads Media

He met me by accident and caused a huge accident in my life before leaving me. I learned a lesson. I learned to stay in my lane and concentrate on my life and the reason I’m here. If a grown-up man could do this to me then you can imagine the pain my age mate can bring to my life. I’m staying out of drama until I know what there’s to know in life.

#MyFirstRelationship

—Elsa

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