I found broken beads in the corner of his clutch. The thread was broken but not removed from the remaining beads; you could see some of the beads were missing, although many were still there. I took the whole thing out and smelled it. It smelled like cheating.

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I took the clutch to him and asked what the beads were doing in his bag. He looked at me as if I were crazy and then smiled. He said, “Are you serious or are you joking? You found it in my bag? Which side of the clutch? Are you sure it’s not yours?”

He made it seem as if he had never come across such a thing in his life. It turned into a huge argument. I felt he was gaslighting me, trying to make me feel like a fool. He even suggested I might have placed it there just to cause a commotion. Finally he said, “You know this clutch wasn’t brand new when I bought it. Maybe the beads belonged to the previous owner.”

I have never felt so stupid in my life. He even thanked me for discovering the beads before they caused him embarrassment in public. This clutch has only four pockets and he’s used it for over a month, yet my husband says he hadn’t come across the beads until I found them.

Now I’m going crazy. I’ve become paranoid. I don’t trust his words. When he’s out, I imagine he’s with the owner of the beads. I think he broke the beads while doing it from behind and decided to keep them as a souvenir. I say “behind” because it’s his favorite thing — he holds the beads while doing it. He does this to me, so I know. That’s the reason I’m losing my mind.

He doesn’t want me to bring it up again. He gets angry when I mention it. He tells me I can announce it to the world and that he doesn’t care because his heart is clean. Am I the one going crazy, or is he the one fanning my paranoia? I want to get to the bottom of it, but to him it’s a closed case. Where do I go from here? How do I let go of this when I know full well he’s lying?

—Erica

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