Some time ago, I found out that my man was cheating on me but that’s not the problem. I admit, discovering he was living a double life broke me in ways I can’t even explain. On top of that, when the issue came up, he said some very hurtful things to me. I found myself questioning my worth, and everything we had built together over the years.

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Earlier in our relationship, I got pregnant but we agreed not to keep it. It was a difficult and emotional experience for me, something I carried heavily in my spirit. So when I found out he was unfaithful, something in me snapped.

In my anger and heartbreak, I said things I shouldn’t have said. I pronounced some curses over his life. I mentioned the aborti(o)n and it happened that I was on my period that day. I used the blood for the curses.

I did not summon any deity, I don’t know any. It was just raw pain and anger speaking through me. But now that the emotions have settled, I deeply regret everything I said.

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I have verbally revoked all the curses. I have prayed and used my own mouth to cancel every negative word I uttered. But my worry is that I don’t know if revoking it by myself is enough.

I keep thinking about it. I panic when I wonder whether the words I said in my moment of rage can still have an effect. I don’t want bad things to happen to him because of my words. I don’t want to feel spiritually responsible for however his life turns out.

What else can I do? Is there a proper way to ensure that everything I said out of pain no longer holds any power?

—Shishi

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