I met Victor through my sister a little over a year ago. Right from the moment he saw me, he liked me. I had just met him but he came across as a very respectful, calm, and charming man. He said he wanted us to be friends. I didn’t mind.

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Soon enough, he expressed interest in starting a romantic relationship with me. By then I had grown to like him so I easily said yes. Everything about him felt right at the time. The way he spoke to me, how he made me laugh, and the attention he gave me, made me feel special.

I believed his intentions were pure.

A few months into the relationship, he sat me down and said, “I have something to tell you.”Nothing prepared me to hear him say the words, “I am married with a child.”

My heart sank. When I agreed to be with him I didn’t sign up to date a married man. It pained me. My first instinct was to walk away, but he begged me not to leave. He said things were not going well in his marriage and that was what pushed him to me.

I didn’t want to be with someone’s husband but we’ve been together for a year now. I’ve given my all to this relationship. Financially, emotionally, and mentally, I’ve invested so much. He has never given me even a pesewa. In fact, there are times I’ve had to give him money when he said he was in need.

I didn’t mind doing all these things for him because he made me happy in his own way. I fell deeply in love with him so I always put him first before myself.

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However, lately I’ve realised that love alone is not enough. I feel used and drained. I’ve tried to break up with him three times, but each time, I find myself going back. It’s like I’m addicted to the idea of him, even though I know I’m hurting myself.

Right now, I’ve made up my mind to let go once and for all. But the truth is, I don’t know how to move on. I don’t know how to stop missing him or erase the memories we shared. Please, I really need your advice — how do I completely forget someone I love so much but know I can never truly have? I feel like I’m losing too much of myself to this relationship.

—Noni

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