My boyfriend and I broke up, and honestly, it was one of the most painful heartbreaks I have ever experienced. It was a long distance relationship, and even though I had every opportunity to cheat because all kinds of men were coming my way, I really wanted us to work, so I stayed faithful.

When the relationship finally ended, I thought I would never recover from the pain. Some days felt unbearable, and I genuinely felt like a part of me had died with the relationship. But somehow, I healed. Slowly, I started eating properly again. I danced alone in my room. I started posting myself more online, partly as proof that I was alive and partly as a message to heartbreak that I survived it.

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Then Micheal resurfaced.

Micheal has been in the background of my life for years. One thing about him has never changed. He has always liked me. One day, we were having a casual conversation when I mentioned how emotionally broken I had been after my breakup. He first responded with a laughing emoji, then later asked what really happened, and I told him everything.

From that moment, he started doing all the things he used to do before we stopped being close because of his feelings for me. There is nothing wrong with someone liking another person or wanting to marry them. The problem is that Micheal already has a fiancée, and they are just a few months away from getting married.

The last time we spoke, he spent a lot of time talking badly about her, almost like he was trying to prove a point to me. He talked about how incapable she was of becoming his wife and kept pointing out her flaws. The whole conversation made me uncomfortable because he went very deep into making her seem unworthy. Meanwhile, in his eyes, I am the perfect woman for him. But honestly, I have been keeping my distance emotionally.

Now things have become even more complicated.

Micheal says he is willing to end his relationship with his fiancée if I agree to be with him. He says he is ready to wait for however long I need before entering a relationship with him. At the same time, I feel pressured into something I am not emotionally ready for, especially after just healing from heartbreak.

What makes everything worse is the way he treats his fiancée. He is rude to her, and he has openly told her that he does not love her and that I am the woman he truly loves. He even told her that if he marries her and someday I decide to come back into his life, he would divorce her and marry me instead. He has shown her my pictures and made her fully aware of his feelings for me.

It did not stop there. He has even started making announcements about cancelling the wedding. The lady’s mother still agreed to let her daughter marry him, even if it means becoming a second wife someday. The fiancée herself has also accepted it. Micheal has helped their family financially, and because of that, they practically worship him.

I feel trapped in the middle of a situation I never asked to be part of. I barely know this man well enough, and I do not want to rush into something that could destroy another woman emotionally. We all attend the same church, which makes the whole situation even more uncomfortable and heartbreaking for me.

The truth is, I can see qualities in Micheal that could make him a good husband someday. But the situation surrounding all of this feels heavy, messy, and emotionally dangerous.

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Now I am stuck in a dilemma. I do not know whether to walk away completely or believe that his feelings are genuine. More than anything, I do not want another woman crying because of me.

—Vera

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