My boyfriend of two years did the knee thing recently and proposed to me in front of some friends of his and mine. I accepted the proposal but before the proposal, I was looking for an opportunity to leave the relationship. I still want to leave. I’m just bidding my time.
For the past two years that we’ve been in a relationship, we’ve been happy for a few periods. There has never been a month that we didn’t face challenges.
His parents didn’t like me at first. They changed along the line because he convinced them to accept me. His father is cool but his mother has been pretending and it shows in the way she acts in my presence. That aside, this guy is very manipulative.
He dictates the kind of friends I should keep and the ones I should do away with. I’ve lost the friends I grew up with because this guy made a conscious effort to drive them away. He wants to control everything in my life including my salary and what to buy with what I earn.
We’ve fought about it but each time we try going our separate ways, he comes back begging me and convincing me that he would turn over a new leaf. I forgive him often, hoping he would change. The change I expected in him has never materialized so I decided I would rather break the relationship than marry him and later regret the marriage.
Just when I was making plans to leave, he also came in hard with a well-planned proposal that came with an expensive ring. He went to see my parents days after the proposal to ask them when it would be appropriate for him to bring his parents. He didn’t tell me before doing it.
I’ve told my parents about my stand and they support me. On the other hand, I don’t want the breakup to happen on a bitter ground. I thought he would wrong me again so I would use the opportunity to leave him but because of this proposal thing, he has been very quiet and forgiving. He does no wrong and it’s becoming hard to leave him.
What strategy can I use to walk out without making him bitter? I wish I could just walk to him and say it’s over without any drama but when this guy hears it’s over, he’ll use the rest of his days to beg and convince me not to leave. He would be all over me, bringing in individuals I wouldn’t like to see around my issues.
What Would Make My Husband Think I’m His Ex?
Meanwhile, he hasn’t done anything positive with all the second chances I’ve given him. I want out once and for all without looking back. Please help.
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Leave before you regret. It’s part of his manipulative tactics
If hell must break loose in order for you to get your freedom so be it. Break it off with him.
Be careful not to regret after leaving cos most of the reasons you stated for wanting to leave are actually not the reasons a woman who loves a man would depend on and walk away.
Talking about his parent, Ive never seen bad son having to convince his parent to like his girlfriend when they initially didn’t.
Him asking you to do away with some friends of yours based on good reason isn’t a bad thing.
And who told you everyone you grew up with must continue being in your life?
Concerning your salary, your challenge actually is he curbing you from impulse buying and misuse of your money. If you find a man like these and call him manipulative, then you are the one with a bigger problem.
He cares too much about his woman.
He doesn’t deserve a woman like you
please walk away.
They are actually the reasons why she should run away from that man. He is literally controlling her life (if what the story says is all there is to it). No one, absolutely no one should dictate the friends you should have and keep. Not your husband or wife let alone your boyfriend/girlfriend. Where did she mention “impulse buying”? Even if she is buying impulsively, the man has no duty dictating what she should do with her money. At best he can suggest and let her decide just as the man decides what he does with his money. Clearly he doesn’t deserve her. No controlling person deserves to be in a relationship. She definitely should walk away for her own peace of mind….
You sound like you are boyfriend and you are using the platform to manipulate her again.
Dear you don’t love the guy again or you have someone else other than that these reasons are not concrete for you to leave because there is no abuse in the relationship. If you you leave you may gain or win but trust me if you see the positive side of this relationship you will enjoy it to the fullest
Return his ring and break off all ties with him. Preferably return his ring in the presence of a witness or two. Don’t be swayed by anyone he brings in and don’t mind if it becomes messy, that will be better than living in regret. Kind regards.