I am 33 years old. This means I am at the age where I am ready to settle down. I pray a lot about the kind of man I want to marry. I ask God to give me a good man. Someone who would love me right and cherish the love I would pour into them. On paper, it doesn’t look like I am asking for much but in reality, it appeared I am looking for the impossible, until my circumstances changed recently.

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I got a new job and had to relocate to a new place. Just as I settled in, I met Selorm. He lives in my new neighbourhood. He is cool. I liked him from the moment we met. We just got along so easily. It feels as if we are old friends who have connected, but we’ve only been friends for two months.

We’ve done a lot of talking within this period. Sometimes we hang out. He is good company. And I like that he makes me feel less alone.

Now here is the thing, he says he is catching feelings for me. To be honest, he ticks almost all the boxes I have prayed for. His character, the way he cares, how he talks to me, and the way he shows he loves me. Everything feels right. I love him too.

He says he sees a future with me. “If things go well I want to marry you within a year,” he proposed. I haven’t said yes to that proposal because of one problem. His age.

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He is 28 years old. He believes I am only two years older than him, and that doesn’t bother him. But the truth is that I am actually five years older. Although most people say I look 27, I am 33.

One day I casually asked him if he would consider dating someone five years older than him. He said, “No, that’s too wide a gap. I can manage two or three years at best.”

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Hearing that made my heart sink, because it means the truth might be a deal-breaker for him. I really like this man. I don’t want to lose him. That is the reason I haven’t told him my real age.

Do I keep quiet, enjoy the relationship as it is, and hope that maybe along the line I will meet an older man who won’t have issues with my age? Or do I tell him the truth now and move on? The thought of walking away from him is so painful.

—Serwaa

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