Three years ago, we became friends and we are still friends. He calls me every day. When I say every day, I mean every single day since we became friends three years ago. He’s registered on every scroll of my call log as if he’s the only number I have on my phone.

A boy and a girl don’t usually stay friends for long so at some point feelings develop. We became attracted to each other and had sex quite a number of times. He didn’t propose before the sex so I was hoping one day he would right the wrongs and propose to me. I wasn’t going to stretch him. All I wanted was for him to say that he loves me and I would look back into his eyes and say, “I love you too.” That never happened.

For a very long time, we kept undressing and dressing up but the proposal never came so I decided to address the issue.

“Young man, what are we doing with our lives? What’s in for both of us, this thing that we are doing?”

His answer was, “Honestly, I don’t know why this is happening. I like you as a friend and don’t want to lose your friendship.”

He called me a friend after everything that had happened but I still didn’t turn off the button of hope. Hearts change. Friendship grows into love. This is life. Everything changes.    

For three years and counting, nothing has changed. Sometimes I become so angry I decide not to visit him again but I don’t know what happens. It looks like some magical wind blows me to his house. By the time I realised, I would be in his house though I’d sworn not to be there.

He is an amazing person and I have never met such a generous person in my life. Hardly will he say ‘No’ if I need any help from him and in fact, he contributed about 70% to the purchase of the phone I’m currently using. His kindness and generosity is the reason I can’t let him go, maybe.

One day we talked about this situationship we find ourselves in and he told me, “I know I’m the reason you don’t give any man a chance in your life but it’s hard.”

He knows all that but why is he not proposing to me?

He says he’s single. I sometimes tell him I’m going on a date with a new guy just to see his reaction but all he will say is, “Let me choose a dress for you when you’re going, okay?”

I really like this guy and I’ve been praying to God to make him mine or better still take him away from me if he’s not meant for me because a girl can’t continue living life like this. I’m afraid I might not be able to love any other man if he doesn’t choose me.

Please what can I do to help my situation? do I do?

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—Akoto

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