At a workshop some years ago, I sat beside her and she charmed me with her intelligence and sense of humor. She was the first to raise her hands to give an opinion and every contribution she made was applauded and called smart. She was a delight at the workshop and drew a lot of people to herself.
That was the first time I saw her. She had traveled from Cape Coast to the workshop and was returning to Cape Coast immediately after the workshop. We exchanged contacts and called it a day.
From our conversations, I got to know she actually worked in Accra but the current project she was working on took her to Cape Coast and was due to return three months later.
I liked her. To say I liked her is an understatement. I loved her. She was focused, career-driven, and seemed to know what she wanted at any given point in time. She was beautiful too.
For the next months or so, we talked every day. Sometimes when we were both not busy, we could chat from morning till we say goodnight to each other. Somehow, I tried making my intention clear to her. I made it obvious through my actions. She wasn’t picking the bait so I had to say in plain language that I wanted her in my life.
She said no. I asked why. She said nothing but no. She kept repeating, “no no no no.” I asked her, “Are you surprised about what I told you or you are finding it hard to process?” Then she started telling me about her love life.
“Guys who come into my life last longer as friends than lovers. Somehow, we spend months together as friends and immediately we agree to date, they leave me after some weeks” “Really?” I asked. She answered, “That has always been the case, trust me. Either there is something wrong with me or there’s something wrong with people who come into my life.”
I knew there was nothing wrong with me and I saw nothing wrong with her. I was convinced she was the one for my life so I persisted until she finally said yes.
That was about three months after we had met at the workshop. She told me she had few weeks to complete the project and would come to Accra immediately after.
She finally came to Accra and the beginning was right there in front of us.
It didn’t take me too long to notice her bad breath. Usually, I brushed it off as one of those moments where we all experience bad breath due to what we ate or drunk. The day we kissed, I couldn’t breathe. The kiss didn’t last for more than five seconds. I was suffocating so I had to pull away.
It was like being forced to smell someone’s fart and it wasn’t easy at all. Again, I wasn’t put off. I started looking for signs and reasons for her bad breath. Her teeth are almost like pearls. Bright and clean. Her tongue has the natural healthy color of a tongue and she brushed her teeth twice a day. After eating out, she would stand in front of the mirror and inspect if there were any particles left in her teeth.
She kept a very strict dental hygiene yet, her breath wasn’t friendly. As she once told me; “You don’t know when the prince would decide to give you a kiss so you have to be ready all the time.”
I loved her and didn’t want her breath to come between us. I wanted to tell her but then I was scared she would take offense.
My friends kept their distance from her whenever she was around. They didn’t tell me but I knew they discussed it among themselves. We went to watch a movie one night and thirty minutes into the movie, the couple sitting next to her changed seats. It was very embarrassing. That night I decided I would tell her and I did.
I told her, “Your breath gets in the way sometimes and it hurts that I haven’t been able to tell you all this while. There is something wrong with your breath and we have to fix it as soon as possible.”
“You mean my breath stinks?” I answered yes! “Since when have you known that?” “Since the very first day we kissed,” I answered.
She felt bruised but I felt good. I was happy to be able to tell her that and I knew we were going to work on it and get the results we both deserved. But my girlfriend went home and never picked my calls for three days.
I thought she was embarrassed and needed time to pull herself together. I gave her space but I never stopped calling. One week later, she hadn’t picked my calls so I went around looking for her. I was told by a lady in her office that she had traveled with the project team to work on a project outside Accra.
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I got the message. She had decided to move on without me. I sent her a very long message telling her how she was overreacting and why I said what I said and how I wanted her so much in my life and all that. The only response I got was, “I’ve moved on with my stinking mouth. You too move on.”
Well, I can’t say I didn’t do my best. I did.
Martin, a very good friend of mine got talking to me and asked, “how is your girlfriend?” I answered, “She left me.” He laughed for some seconds and said, “Gyai no. )no koraa n’enum bon.” (Allow her to go. Her breathe stinks!)
Friends…
-Aflakpui
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Well you tried but you could have tried smarter. Perhaps you could have brought up a need to visit the dentist at least twice in a year for both of you(which should be the case anyways for all of us).
That way that problem would be picked up by the professionals and handled professionally without you getting her hurt.
Hmmm.. it’s sad she didn’t want you help her. Hmmm…