My friend gave me a hint that my girlfriend was cheating with a man living close to his house. I disregarded it because I trusted my girlfriend. When he came again to repeat the accusation, I told him I was looking into it so he should relax. He said, “Looking into what? I can blow the whistle so we catch her.”

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Eventually he notified me when my girlfriend was there and all night we stood at the entrance waiting for her to come out. I was texting her, asking her where she was. She said she was at her mom’s place and was getting ready to leave.

At some point I called and she didn’t answer. That was when my friend decided to go and knock on the door and see what was happening. My heart was breaking. My knees were wobbly. You could see me visibly shaking. We had dated for seven months and everything was perfect between us.

She has been the only girlfriend who helped me out financially when I was down and out. No, it wasn’t a loan. She gave me GHC3,000 and told me, “Pay for mom. I know you’ll do it for me when the tables turn.” That aside, she was with me through it all during the difficult times, sometimes even giving me something to give to my mom when I went to see her at the hospital.

My friend knocked and the man came out. I was standing afar watching. I didn’t have the strength to go close. The man had a towel around his waist. My friend told him he was looking for Belinda and the man said he didn’t know anyone by that name.

We stood in the dark corner watching until late in the night when my girlfriend came out. It was embarrassing but I treated her with respect. We got a taxi and sat in silently and left. I asked why and all she did was say sorry and cry.

By the time I realized it, all our paddies knew about the incident and were calling me to tell me what I should do to my girlfriend. “Shun her! She be devil waaa. A woman like this will block your success with her bad luck.”

I called my friend and said, “I thought it was just between you and me. Why is everyone talking about it now?” He burst out laughing and said, “Charley, women like that ought to be put to shame. She’s a whore!”

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My heart broke. I told him to leave us alone while we sought to find redress. He screamed, “Re… what? You’re still talking to her?”

I want to forgive and start a new page with her but now, everyone is aware and it’s hard for me to let this go. Already, they are laughing at me and calling me names for still entertaining her. She faulted, yes but I don’t believe we should cut people off just because they sinned once. But my guys don’t want to hear that. They are all playing the drumbeat of abandonment.

Now I don’t know what to do…

—Nino 

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