In the beginning, Yaw would call me twelve times a day. That was the level of our addiction. Some days, he would stay on the line just to listen to the sound of our breathing. That was enough; it was a type of love language that satisfied us both. On other days, we talked about family and how many kids we wanted. We even named them and imagined what our life together would look like.
He asked me to get pregnant for him. He argued that we were not getting any younger and that we were ready. It was true that he was forty-five and I was twenty-nine. He had the means to provide for us because of his work in security. I did not doubt that he could provide, but I wondered if he was going to be a great father.
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Everything changed after we started having sex. He flipped the coin and revealed sides of himself I never expected from a man who claimed to be in love.
Suddenly, I was the one begging him for a conversation. When I complained, he would simply say, “It is work. I am busy.”
He started telling me that I did not talk any sense or would mock me by saying it was my first time being logical.
When he spoke, I had to stay quiet; if I didn’t, he would use unpleasant words. Some days, when I asked if I could visit, he would respond with a cold, “If you want to.” It felt like an insult, but I went anyway. That day especially, I thought we had a good time, only to wake up and see his WhatsApp status: “She’s cute, she’s cute, but she has no sense.”
I was hurt. I reread every word of that post, searching for a reason to stay, but the truth was right in front of me. He was talking about me; he had said it so many times before. “Do you even have sense?” Seeing it there was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I packed my things and left.
God knows I tried my best. God knows that for a man his age, he was only playing games and I became his victim. I am still in the middle of this heartbreak. It is weighing on me heavily, but I am leaving the rest to faith and fate.
What Nobody Tells You About Divorce
We are finished, but memories of the last time we were together play on a loop in my head. I am terrified that I might be pregnant right now. I have not taken a test yet because I am too scared to walk into a pharmacy to buy one. I really do not want to be pregnant. This cannot be how my story ends. I want no more ties with him.
—Davida
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This is sad to read. Sis, i was in a relationship just like yours and instead of cold and dismissive words, I got a man who engulfed every aspect of me. He was everywhere and woe betides me that around 8pm, I dare to receive a call. He would say that am cheating on him, he would say I didnt love him enough, that i was pushing him away. He never failed to critize me on everything and when he got drunk, then that day i won’t sleep because that was when the other gut-wrenching abusive words came out. He tore me away from my family, turned me against everyone because they stood in the way of our love. How he did it isn’t the problem but the fact that i allowed it to happen is what eats at me because that person wasn’t me. He was possessive, vindictive, and I couldn’t breathe. In summary, it was a toxic relationship where I didnt know where he begun and I ended. I dont know how I did it but I broke off the relationship. It still amazes me where I got the strength.
Then color me shocked, my period didn’t come and I was panicking. For almost 2 months! I was stressed on a whole new level. I did scans and they said that my endometruim is thick so either am about to shed it as menstruation/period or implantation has taken place. That even pushed me over the edge.
And during those times, all I kept saying was that though I loved babies, would love to have mine, but this particular baby, I didnt want because it would forever tie me to my ex and I didn’t think I could find it in me to even open the door a tiny fraction for him.
Then one day, after the 25th or something pregnancy test proved negative again, I decided to stop beating myself up and what do you know, the next few days, my period came.
Then I got sad again, can you believe it? I got sad because after the whole stress of it, i realized that the baby would have had 50% of my ex but also 50% of my DNA too and I would have loved the hell out of that baby, my firstborn.
Sis, am sharing this here because I want you to know that I understand what youre going through. After that heartbreak, you need to heal and not have another reminder of the pain again. I prayed to God, asked him for forgiveness and told him to take the baby away. Don’t know if he heard me but all I know is that, I don’t have a living reminder of my ex, I was saved, I was freed. May God also hear your prayers..
I was later made to understand that the reason for the delay in my period was because I took 2 emergency pills in a month and that pushed/delayed/messed my period. The second reason was that everytime I worried about the pregnancy and what it would mean, I got stressed and the stress in turn also affected the period as well.
I’m truly grateful to SEFTYHUB for their professionalism and support during a very difficult time in my relationship. They provided expert guidance and digital investigation assistance that helped me uncover the truth I needed to move forward with clarity and confidence.
Communication was clear, timely, and respectful, and the entire process was handled discreetly. Thanks to their help, I was able to confirm my suspicions and make informed decisions about my future.
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