Before we started dating, my husband told me about a child he had with his ex-girlfriend. At the time, the boy was only three years old. It didn’t bother me much, and I even assured him that if the relationship turned into marriage, I wouldn’t mind if he brought the boy to live with us.

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When we got married, we went to see the boy’s mother and arranged to bring the child to live with us. I was thankful that she didn’t make the process long and treacherous. I liked her and assured her the boy would have the best care.

We live in my father’s house, a three-bedroom house I stopped him from renting out because I wanted us to live there. It’s close to my workplace and also close to town, so life is easier living here. We brought this child to come and live with us.

I treat him like my own son. He goes to one of the best schools around and calls me Mom because that’s what I’ve become since I brought him in. He’s even closer to me than his own dad. I called his mom once in a while, and she also called if she needed to speak to the boy.

All was well until one day I saw that the boy’s mother had posted outdooring ceremony photos of her new baby girl. I was pleasantly surprised and asked when she got pregnant and why she didn’t tell me so I could bring my gift. We laughed about it and I congratulated her.

Not long afterwards, I found out this new child also belongs to my husband.

The shock nearly rendered me lifeless. He was talking on the phone but didn’t know I was close. He was talking almost in whispers until I heard, “Don’t be calling me like this. Do you want her to suspect this one is also mine?”

Because I didn’t want him to lie, I went through his phone for confirmation and everything was there. Even his uncle and elder brother attended the naming ceremony. While I was asking him about it and he was lying, his bags were being thrown out one after the other. Even at that stage, he swore heaven and earth that I was mistaken.

By the time he confessed it was true but an honest mistake, everything he owned was already outside the door. The only thing that broke my heart was his son looking at me as I did that to his father, but I had no choice. The next thing to happen is to officially go through a divorce so he can go ahead and marry the woman he now has two children with.

My current dilemma now is his son. This boy loves me deeply, and it shows in everything he does and even in the kind of boy he is growing up to become. His hobbies are my influence. His character is the result of my direction and tutelage. Even my dad calls him his first grandchild. He’s still here with me and I don’t know how to deal with it.

It’s Not God’s Law For A Man To Apologize To A Woman

I’ve asked him to come for his son, but a piece of me feels hurt that I’m throwing the child out too for a sin he didn’t commit. As for the mother, I’ve blocked her just like I’ve blocked the man who got her pregnant. Surprisingly, they haven’t made any move to come for the child. Maybe they will come, but when? I know I can’t keep him, but it’s also not easy to let him go.

—Nadia

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