I felt sad when I read the story about the ten-year-old child who tells everyone his mother’s husband is his stepfather. We are not in the same shoes but the lady’s story reminded me of my situation.

I too have a ten-year-old son. But in my story, there is no husband. My son’s father has never been in the picture. Oh, he is alive. He just decided to shirk his responsibilities as a father and leave me to do all the work. He doesn’t support us financially. I made my peace with that long ago. So I am not here to complain about him.

I have a job that helps me take care of my son the best way I can. I provide everything he needs. When it comes to things he wants too, I go the extra mile to get them for him. I thought my efforts were enough to make him happy but now he is asking me for something I cannot buy with money.

He wants a father in his life very badly. Sadly his father is not willing to be present in his life. The man doesn’t even make the effort to come and see his son. I have tried to be everything to my boy. “Even though I am your mummy, I am your daddy too. Whatever you need your daddy for, ask me and I will do it for you.” I have said this to him over and over again but it’s not having the intended effect on him.

It has been only the two of us his whole life. But he sees other kids at school who have both parents. That’s where all his questions come from. He doesn’t understand why other kids have fathers as well as mothers but he only has Mummy.

Sometimes kids at school ask him, “Where is your daddy?” When he tells them it is just the two of us, they ask more questions. He comes to tell me about them and I give him explanations he can easily understand.

I thought we were on the same page. It didn’t occur to me that the questions about his daddy bothered him until recently. I was at home when he came to me and said, “Mummy, I told that man that my daddy is outside the country. So please when he asks you say it’s true, okay?” I felt a lump in my throat immediately. I couldn’t speak so I had to nod as I fought back tears.

Something inside me broke that day. It was not easy for me to process the impact my baby daddy’s absence has on my son. I thought he was only confused about why his father wasn’t in his life. I didn’t know he was ashamed of it too. Why else would he lie to someone that his father lives overseas? Tell me, how am I supposed to feel as his mother knowing this?

I have tried to find love again but it hasn’t been easy as a single parent. I know there are men out there who don’t have problems dating a single mother. That gives me hope but the thing is, I don’t want to date for dating sake. This goes beyond me. It’s about my son too.

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I am not looking for someone who will love only me. I want a father figure for my son. A man who will embrace my little boy and give him the love his biological father never gave him.

This is why the lady’s story made me sad. It reminded me of the irony of life. While I am here with a ten-year-old boy who is looking for someone to call daddy, her little boy is pushing away the man he should be calling daddy.

I Had Some Hope For Marriage Until He Invited Me To His Wedding

I don’t want to make a mistake in my quest to fill this big void in my son’s life so I have decided to trust in God’s will.

It’s not easy but I am going to keep praying and believing God for a miracle. I tap into the lady’s blessings. One day my son is going to call a good man daddy, and his heart will feel full.

— Brit

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