We’ve been dating for a while now. I love her. I have studied her well and I know that she is someone who will bring me peace of mind in marriage. We’ve discussed our future occasionally but we didn’t put a timeline on things. We just want to go with the flow and see where the current leads us. This is something we both want. We just want to take our time and explore what we have so that by the time we tie the knot, we know we are both ready.
We’ve done things in the relationship. By that, I mean we’ve had shuperu. So I wasn’t surprised when she called one day and said, “Marcus, I am late.” I didn’t need to ask her, “Where are you going that you are late?” Although it was the first time the subject was coming up, I knew she meant her period had delayed.
We talked about it and agreed she would take a test. I wasn’t there when she took the test. I didn’t see any evidence of the test either. I trusted her so much that I didn’t question her when she told me she was pregnant.
She sounded scared. “Babe, what are we going to do? We didn’t plan for this,” she said repeatedly. She was right. We didn’t plan for a baby but it was happening. What was there to do but to man up and take responsibility?
I spoke calm into her being. “You don’t need to panic. No matter how much people prepare, nobody is truly ready for a baby. I have a job so I will take of you and the baby. Give birth.” She sighed and said, “Okay, then we’ll have the baby.” For some reason, she wasn’t behaving like a pregnant woman so I repeatedly asked her if she was truly pregnant. All those times she said yes.
Two weeks after she broke the news to me, I told my mother about the pregnancy. Culturally, my family has to meet hers for an official introduction so we can discuss the way forward. So after I shared the news with my mother, I asked my girlfriend to also tell her mum about it.
She agreed to do it, but at some point, she started dragging her feet. I grew up in Accra but I live in another region because of work. My girlfriend and her family live in Accra. I was still in Accra after talking to my mum and I wanted to stay and meet her family before I returned to work but my girlfriend was standing in the way of that.
It was obvious she didn’t want me to meet her family yet, so I left town. I would ask about the pregnancy and she would list a series of symptoms and tell me she was experiencing them.
“I am nauseous.”
“I am sleeping all the time.”
“I feel tired.”
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She did this for an entire month and I believed her. Then she woke up one morning and told me everything she said was a lie. I was confused. “What do you mean it’s a lie? You are not pregnant?” She paused for a few seconds and answered, “Yes, I am not pregnant. I was just testing you to see how you will react.” I can’t say I am not disappointed by what she did.
I wasn’t expecting a pregnancy but when it happened, I started wanting it. Now I feel betrayed that everything has been a lie. I am not sure how I can trust her after this. I want to leave the relationship. Will I be right to do so?
—Marcus
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#SB
Ohh naa. I think she just want to test the real u, the kind of person u are or the kind she’s with or if something like this happened how u will take it ,since both not ready for marriage. Maybe she just want to know if she’s at the right place. U kn some men who are not for u will just start reacting if u tell them u pregnant. Either they will tell u to abort , ghost u etc. so relax, maybe her mum even advised her on her action so she doesn’t waste her time.