If you haven’t read the first part of this story, here’s the link. Kindly read it before starting this one.

I was desperate to prove a point. I was wrong to travel all that way to see another woman but nothing happened. It was my trump card and I was ready to go all out to prove to my wife that I made a mistake but the white at the tip of the lizard’s poo is that I didn’t sleep with her.

Her father listened to me. He was the one doing everything to facilitate our way to forgiveness. He told me, It’s going to be a long way but you have to be patient. You said you’ll make my daughter speak to the girl, right?” I nodded and right there called out the girl’s number. That was a mistake. The girl made the issue worse for me and to date, If I had to rewrite the story of my life, I would deliberately delete the part where this girl made an entrance.

My wife didn’t want to talk to her. She insisted the lady did no wrong. She asked, “Dad, What am I even going to tell her? Isn’t it embarrassing to call another woman to ask if she slept with my husband?”

I insisted. For the sake of peace and erasure of doubt, we decide to call the girl. She was on loudspeaker when I called her. She was already angry because, after that day, I didn’t answer her calls and messages. She asked, “Why are you calling me? What do you want?”

I explained the issue at hand to her and told her to say exactly what happened when I visited. She laughed. She asked, “So your wife is there with you? Are you serious?” I begged her to answer my question. She said, “Yes you slept with me. If she knew how to keep a man, you wouldn’t have been here with me. If she’s listening, I repeat, you slept with me or I should tell her the styles?”

I cut the call. I buried my face in my palm. My wife walked away with her mom in tow. I screamed, “She’s lying. Don’t believe her. She’s only paying me back.” Her father looked at me with the eyes of understanding. He tapped my shoulders and told me not to worry. “I’m with you. She will come back home.”

A week later, I heard she had gotten a new place. She came by to collect her stuff. Immediately she entered the door, I locked it up and pocketed the keys. I said, “We have to talk. You have to listen to me and I’m going to talk all night.” She picked up her phone to call someone. The person didn’t answer. She told me, “If you don’t open the door, the police will be here.”

She called again and again but the person did not respond. She sat down and I began talking. After talking for what looked like forever, she asked, “Can I go now?” I opened the door and she left with whatever was in her hands. Not too many things. Almost a month later, my dad called that there was a meeting. She came to meet my parents with hers.

She made demands. I was to test for HIV, Hepatitis and other sexually transmitted diseases. I said OK. I went home very happy because I knew she was coming back. A woman leaving a man won’t ask him to do a test. Of what use is a test to the one leaving?

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She came home one evening with our baby. That was even before I could do the test. I did the sign of the cross and asked if there was something I could give her. She didn’t mind me but wherever she went, I followed. She cooked, I helped. Even when she hadn’t called for my help. When the baby cried, I helped. I didn’t know I knew how to sing a lullaby. In the night, she went to sleep in the hall. I begged her to come to the bedroom while I went to sleep in the hall.

It’s a long way to forgiveness, I knew it. I was taking things slowly. Even when she didn’t talk to me, I understood her. One morning she asked, “Have you done the test?” I rushed in to show her the results. She asked, “The HIV one, you have to do it again three months later, right?” I nodded. She asked, “And you believe you can stay away from sex for three months? I mean the sex you take from outside.”

“It didn’t happen. Why don’t you believe me?”

The baby couldn’t sleep one night so we were both awake until dawn. She asked me to sleep. I told her I couldn’t sleep. We talked and for the first time, she said something positive about the incident. “I believed you when you said you didn’t sleep with her. I know when you are lying. The problem was your boldness to have a girlfriend when I was always with you here.”

We talked about the whole thing, the fact that I was sex-starved and all. I told her I’d learned my lesson. She told me she could have compromised if only she could. “Pregnancy is painful. I was always dry and wanted to vomit. Your body scent was killing me but I couldn’t tell you about it. I was carrying a lot but…”

I shushed her and told her I would be better.

We are still here with a marriage that looks like it hadn’t been at the precipice of divorce. We vowed to be transparent to each other going forward. The doors I closed, I learned to leave them ajar so she could look through them any time she wanted. She knows my password. She can pick up my phone at any time and can even read my messages to me when they come.

I Suspected She Was Cheating On Me But There Was No Way To Prove It

It’s a long way to forgiveness but patience is the key that unlocks the heart and allows the prodigal son to enter the father’s house. Whatever we have now, I don’t take it for granted. I’ve sweated for it and it’s the reason our child can have a home where a father and mother live together.     

—Kwame Ato

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