My husband is very stubborn. He doesn’t listen to me when things are going wrong. He feels he’s always right and as a woman, I have to listen to what he says. We always run into problems. When we fight, even when I’m right, I apologise and forgive him easily. He would keep fighting me for days. He won’t eat my food or even give me housekeeping money.
I was frustrated so I figured I had to talk to someone about our struggles. My parents were the wrong people to talk to so I avoided them—especially my dad. Even if I’m wrong, he’ll say I’m right and start a fight with whoever I’m fighting with. I decided not to bring them into my marital issues because they can make things worse. So I spoke to my husband’s parents.
I narrated all our troubles without any exaggeration. By the time I got back home, my husband was aware and was so pissed. “What gave you the audacity to speak to my parents? Am I a child? You told them so they’ll come and beat me?”
All I wanted was for them to speak to my husband but in the end, they rather called me in the presence of my husband and gave me a proper dress down. His mom said, “I know you’ve been telling a lot of people about this, making my son look bad in public. What is it that you can’t settle but go around telling people?”
His father also contributed and they later gave the floor to my husband. Come and see insults and name-calling. Even when I started crying, he didn’t stop. He kept going and going until his dad screamed, “Won’t you apologize to him so he stops insulting you? You don’t know how to say sorry? Is that what you do in the marriage?”
He Said The Pregnancy Was An Accident
I feel defeated and worn out. My husband now knows I have nowhere to turn to so he treats me anyhow and talks to me the way he feels is right even when he’s wrong. I can’t go out there and talk to anyone about my marriage and its troubles. I don’t want to bring my parents in. If my dad gets to hear what my in-laws did to me, he will be in their house the next minute. Who do I talk to now? We Don’t have a pastor.
— Abena
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Pls talk to your parents,since his parents are not the kind of people to caution their son when he is wrong. What u were avoiding from your parent became worse! Pls inform your parent so he will also know u have people to back u up and treat you better
You have to find a way of teaching your husband a lesson yourself, by your actions. First of all deny him sex. If you have a spare bedroom, move into it. Try the old silent treatment; serve him whatever you serve him, but no talking. If none of it works, go and visit a friend for a week or so. If he begins to realize that he could loses you, he will start to shake himself from his current complacent slumber. Just find a way of shaking him up.
When you talk to your parents it would only worsen things. If he decides something just let him do it . Don’t fight him on it because he would use it as an opportunity to disrespect you. Sometimes it good to play the I don’t care attitude and just go about your business. If you can’t tell your parents then you can tell God. Pray so that God would make you his mouth piece just like he did to moses. Make God your all. Pray for your husband to see the signs when he decides to do something. You telling your problems to people only worsens stuff. Just back your husband with prayers. Kasa mfa twhee ba.
One day,this man will get violent knowing she has no one to talk to and the end result will be deadly.
Please kindly talk to your parents and them reset his Brians. There is life after marriage. She shouldn’t be afraid to walk away if things don’t change.
Enough of the wickedness and slavery in the name of marriage.
Marriage is a union between two families, inform your parents about the situation you’re going through
It’s better they become aware before it’s late
I’m afraid it’s time to bring it the cavalry! No matter who else you bring into this matter, his parents would see it as a sign of disrespect and back him to make matters worse. If it’s a shouting match they want, a shouting match they’ll get! At the end of the day both sides will either calm down and draw barriers or break up! Either way, your current situation is unhealthy for your mental health and your children
If you won’t talk to your parents be there and suffer. Who do you want to talk to? His parents couldn’t talk sense into him and you’ve refused to talk to your parents because your dad will do what? Didn’t his parents do worse??
Where exactly do some women get these men who treat them like slaves? Most of us see these red flags way before marriage but go ahead to marry because a lot of people are getting married. The next thing you’ll realise is, it’s too late for you to leave because he’ll beat you till you end up in the hospital. Who told you that’s how marriage is??