Nancy came into my life at a time when I had no business having a girlfriend. I had no job, I had no plans for the future, I was just a mess. Dating someone was the only thing I thought I could do to feel alive and Nancy was there for the taking so I took her. She understood my situation and knew it wasn’t going to be bad forever. From the beginning, she was very understanding until the colours began to fade.

She told me about a guy who proposed to her. According to her, she didn’t like anything about the guy and was even angry when the guy proposed to her. I was happy she told me about the guy but as the days went by, I kept seeing her with the guy often. The first person who saw them together in the night was my best friend Eric. He called me on the phone and told me everything that was happening. I told him, “Approach her so she knows you’ve seen her.”

Minutes later, Eric came home with Nancy in tow. They were both laughing. I was angry she had to go out with the same guy she said she didn’t like. I was shouting at her, demanding answers as to why she was out there with him. “Or you were lying when you told me you didn’t like him? Why are you still following him?” She answered, “He was going to buy me food. I don’t like him but he’s a kind person.”

It was Eric who helped us resolve our issues that day. I didn’t have money to buy her food so she followed another man. I felt deflated but Eric asked me to trust her because he was there and saw everything. “It didn’t look like a romantic story, trust me,” Eric said. I believed that. Not because I had a choice. If you can’t take care of your girlfriend, other men will help you take care of her.

Regardless of the fights and incessant misunderstandings, Nancy was good to me. She was working with her mom. She would bring foodstuff home to cook for me. When I needed financial assistance, she did her best for me. In my mind, she was the one I was going to do life with for the rest of my life because she had it all, everything I wanted in a woman.

We had a little fight one day and it was that small fight that brought our relationship to its knees. She called my phone during the day and I couldn’t answer. In the evening I called back but she didn’t answer. I called until late in the night, she didn’t pick up. I even asked Eric to call and see if she would pick up. Eric later called to tell me she didn’t answer her phone. I went to her house around 10 pm to check, only to see her watching TV with her phone by her side, refusing to answer my phone.

That was the reason for the fight. She was retaliating. She called in the day and I didn’t pick up so she wasn’t going to pick up my calls in the night. We argued, we threw baseless accusations where she asked me to find a job and I also told her to stop sleeping around with men she claimed she didn’t like. I think I went too far and it got to her. She told me, “If you had a job and was able to hold your own, you wouldn’t be worried about other men because they’re better than you.”

I was hurt paaa but I didn’t call to end the relationship. She did. I apologized for my harsh words and asked her to forgive but she told me she was far gone and nothing would bring her back. Again, I sent Eric on a mission to bring her back into a relationship with me. Days later, Eric called, “My guy, it’s not working. It looks like she’s determined not to come back this time. Let’s give it some time and see.”

Our relationship didn’t recover again from that fall. We had dated for two years and she had been my support in times of struggle so losing her really got to me. I was brokenhearted for days. It was Eric who stood by me, laughed at me, and encouraged me at the same time. He called me a ‘jon boy’ and asked why I would allow a woman to bring me to ground zero.

A few months later, I found out Eric was dating Nancy. I wasn’t told. I found out with my own eyes. Eric ooo. My best friend Eric, the one who had been there with me through thick and thin. The mediator, the one I sent on a mission to rescue my dying relationship with Nancy. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to be shocked but I did. I didn’t see it coming until it arrived.

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I held my heart as if it would fall if left it alone. They didn’t expect to see me that day but I was there, looking at Eric in shorts while Nancy was half-dressed and sitting next to Eric. While Nancy looked away, Eric walked to me and said, “Sorry, I was looking for a better time to tell you. I’m sorry you found out this way.”

Nancy didn’t look at me once and didn’t do anything to show she was sorry I found out. She walked inside the bedroom and didn’t come out until I walked away with my heart in pieces.

“Wow, wow, wow.”

It Will Be Difficult For Me To Commit To One Person

I kept repeating that to myself until I got home. Months later, I still catch myself saying wow, anytime it comes to mind. After that day, Eric called that he wanted to see me so we talk. I told him he didn’t need to see me or say anything. Again he said he was sorry. I told him it was OK cos everyone deserves love and I was happy he found love in Nancy.

He hasn’t called again and it makes me wonder, “When did they start seeing each other? Did he go when I sent him on a mission to rescue our sinking relationship? Or he was the reason we sunk so fast and so deep?” I will not have answers to these questions but I wish them well though I wish they crash and break to pieces just like I did when I found them out.

—Proff

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