I don’t come from a well to home. In fact, I am an orphan with no strong support from my family. I had to hustle to put myself through school. Now I am in my final year in College. Everything it costs me to stay in school, I strive to make the money for it. Right from learning materials, food and other necessities, to accommodation. It’s a difficult situation but I am good at managing my finances so it hasn’t been totally bad.

I live in a rented apartment close to my school. I used to live here alone but recently I decided to accommodate a roommate to split the cost of accommodation and other living expenses. This is a woman who is ten years older than me. I felt she was mature enough for us to live peacefully. And she has proved to be a big sister to me. I like her.

I can boldly say that she is the one person in my life that I can call a friend. Even that one, it is because we live together. Naturally, I like to keep to myself. When I am not in school or out working for money, I am at home. I don’t go to social places. I don’t invite people over either. I lived a quiet and dull life until my Akua joined me.

Unlike me, she has friends. She is not particularly a social butterfly but she has lots of friends on campus. These friends of hers are from rich homes. It’s reflected in their lifestyle. That’s one thing my roommate doesn’t have in common with them. She doesn’t have money in abundance. That’s how she ended with me anyway.

When she moved in, we agreed that we would share everything including food. We would plan what we would eat for the week and then prepare enough of it to sustain us. Sometimes we would agree to ration the food to last a week or even more. However, within two days everything would finish.

Now, the food doesn’t finish because she eats it all. No, it’s because she is just too generous for her own good. I even feel bad for feeling this way about such a good person. Ever since we started living together, she has been nothing but kind to me. However, this same kindness of hers is a drain on my finances.

Before her, I could spend GHC200 on food for an entire month. Food is quite cheap here, and I don’t eat much so it works. However, she is the kind of person who would invite her friends home whenever we cook. Sometimes these people don’t even say they are hungry. As long as she has seen food at home she would distribute it until it is finished. So whatever plans we make to ration our food go down the drain.

There is nothing wrong with being benevolent but this is someone who doesn’t mind giving her last ten pesewas to someone if it means she sleeps on an empty stomach. She does not pause to think about herself or her own needs. She just gives. That’s how one day we woke up with no food in the house and no money. I was upset but I just drank water and went to study. Later, I had to borrow money for us to eat that day.

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One day I sat her down and explained to her that things are hard for me. “I am able to survive to this point because I have always been good at managing my money. But this ‘give everything away’ habit of yours is a dent in my system. I am not saying don’t be generous. All I am saying is, it shouldn’t come at the expense of our needs.” Instead of seeing reason in what I said, she responded; “Food is nothing. Don’t worry, if I give everything out God will provide for us.” See how draining it is to deal with her?

She makes it look like I am a stingy person when I complain but I am only looking out for us. The sad part is, that these rich friends of hers don’t even give her a dime to say thank you for the food. They see it as a benefit of their friendship. And it is no fault of theirs. They didn’t ask to be fed. They can afford their own food so it’s up to us to manage the little we have. But my roommate doesn’t understand this.

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I used to do what she does. Give out everything I have to people even when it leaves me with nothing. I had to learn the hard way to look out for my interests and help people when I can. That’s how my life became easier. Unfortunately, that is no longer the case, as I am shacked up with someone who makes me spend more money on food than necessary.

Anytime I think about the whole situation I feel like I am not a good person for wanting to manage the little I have. I ask myself if it is alright to have food but keep it from others. That’s why I need the audience to tell me if I am wrong here or if it is my roommate who is misunderstanding what needs to be done. Tell me something, for it drains me when I try to find a way around our differences.

— Kakra

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