I grew up in a broken home because of adultery. This is the reason I was determined not to allow the same thing to happen to me when I start a family. That’s why it was always important to me that I marry a God-fearing man. Isaac was an embodiment of that. He is from a staunch Christian home. He also serves as a minister in church. If you are looking for the definition of pious, he is the one. It was the first thing that made me consider his proposal.

I was still a student at the university when he asked me to marry him. Although I loved him, I wasn’t ready to take such a big step. I didn’t want to jump into marriage without first attaining financial independence. “I will marry you but not now,” I told him, “let me finish school and get a job before we start making plans.” He said I was worth the wait.

He waited for me right from 2016 until November 2023 when we finally got married. In 2021, we decided to start a business together, a shop. Isaac’s job sent him overseas at that time. Which made the shop my sole responsibility. I had a job and so did he. To manage things, we agreed to employ a young lady to work for us. I supervised her and reported the accounts to Isaac. This was how things worked until he came down last year for our wedding.

I put in a lot of work to run the shop from January to October of last year. This involved everything from stocking to balancing to supervising to bringing in additional capital. It was easy to do when I was single and he wasn’t here. However, after we got married I struggled to combine my already demanding job, wifely duties, and running the business. So I asked him to take full control over the shop’s supervision.

I must admit, the girl I hired is more beautiful and younger than I am. She has a nice body. My mother advised me against hiring beautiful and curvy girls but I always dismissed her. I tell her, “You don’t know Isaac like I do. He is not one of those men with weak morals who will risk everything we are building together just for a good time with someone who doesn’t mean anything to him.” This is what I also tell myself. Whenever I heard other women say they couldn’t trust their husbands, I couldn’t relate. I knew I could stick my neck out and say mine was trustworthy.

Ever since we got married, we have been trying to conceive. So far nothing has happened. Every time I get my period, my mother-in-law and my husband get disappointed. I am trying not to be too anxious about it because we haven’t been married for up to a year. However, I am under a lot of pressure from Isaac and his mum.

While I was drowning in stress, my husband started spending a lot of time at the shop. He would come home later than necessary. When I complained he said, “You can’t trust people completely with your business. That’s why I have been spending much time there.” It sounded reasonable at first but after a while, my doubts kicked in. I felt he was overdoing the supervision. One day I told him, “I don’t think it’s healthy how much time you spend with that girl at the shop.” “Why are you being insecure? All I am trying to do is protect our business,” he retorted.”

Three weeks ago, I wasn’t feeling well while I was at work. I had no choice but to go home early. Under normal circumstances, I would have gone to the shop first but something pushed me to head home straight. I got home and had the shock of my life.

My sweet and pious husband was in our matrimonial bed with our shop attendant. The doors were locked and they were playing loud music. Fortunately, or I should say, unfortunately, they forgot to close the windows. That was where I watched everything unfold. I was too numb to move a muscle or even make a sound. I just stood at the window like a ghost watching life go on without me.

When I finally got myself together, I unlocked the door and went inside. By then they were done. They didn’t know how much I saw. I didn’t tell them either. I just greeted them, sat on the bed for a while, and then left the house. My thoughts were all over the place. I didn’t know whether to crawl or run. I didn’t know if I should hold my breath till I drop dead or if I should scream my lungs out. I felt chills on my arms while sweat coated my forehead. My nerves were just as chaotic as my mind.

When I returned home my husband looked me in the face and said, “It’s not what you think. The girl came here to enlist my help in her search for another job.” Look at that! Even if you want to lie, must it be a dumb lie? How ridiculous!

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Since that day, my house has been silently unhappy. I don’t know how to handle this. I haven’t talked to anyone about it, but I’m burning inside. We’ve just been married for six months, so I’m not sure if a divorce would be wise or even possible.

I go about my business as if I am okay but slowly, I am fading away. I have trouble focusing at work. I don’t want to be mocked for not being able to sustain a marriage for even a year. But staying in the marriage is not helping me. I find it impossible to look at this man. I hate him so much that I wish he would simply vanish.

He Got Me Pregnant And Also Got His Ex Pregnant

He thinks that because he apologized, I should just forget about it and move on as if nothing has happened. In other words, he is making me feel like a bad person for not letting this go. This same adultery that shattered my family when I was young has become the very thing tearing my new family apart. I think about leaving and it makes me feel like a failure. But when I think about staying, my heart becomes too heavy for me to bear.

What is one supposed to do under such circumstances? Is it wrong to fully commit, trust, and love someone? I am twenty-seven. Am I not too young for all this stress?

— Ssanga

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