I had always wanted to attend a single-sex school. However, the computerized Schools Selection and Placement System put me in a mixed school in the Eastern Region. I hated it but there was nothing I could do to change the situation. With my broken heart and spirit, I attended the school. To make myself feel better, I decided not to go for dining. The food was terrible so I wasn’t missing much. Besides, I was very shy back then. This made me avoid social situations.

Every day during lunchtime, I would go sit under a tree and think about my miserable experience in school. Unbeknownst to me, there was a boy who always watched me sit under the tree and admired me. This lad who was a visual art student was equally not enthused about our school and the dining hall food. So he sat in class at lunchtime and looked out the window. And I was the view he enjoyed looking at. I was his afternoon muse.

I found out he had noticed me after he went to my only friend on campus for my number. We were not allowed to have phones in school but some of us treated that rule like it didn’t exist. So he called after he got my number. And told me about all the times he watched me from his classroom window. He said he liked me and would like to get to know me. I liked him too. His name is Stif. He is a tall handsome guy with pink lips and bow legs. Most of the girls in my dorm always had his name on their lips. And I found it irritating.

I saw him as an arrogant guy, so when I started liking him I was confused. I didn’t understand why my heart chose to betray me in that manner. I was afraid of getting involved in a relationship. I also didn’t feel comfortable dating someone in my school. So I turned him down when he asked me to be his girlfriend. Stif asked me, “Are you saying you don’t have feelings for me? Because if that’s the case I will leave you alone. But if there’s another reason, I need to know.” I told him, “If we are both in the same school while dating, people will tease us. And I don’t want that kind of attention.” He sighed in relief after I said this.

“I am not coming back to school next term,” he assured me. I didn’t believe him but he was persistent. He said he was transferring to a boys’ school so there was no need for me to reject him. “Nobody will tease you, I promise.” I was convinced he was telling the truth. So I said yes and we started dating.

He transferred to a single-sex school in the central region the next term as he promised. We went out to almost every SHS show and event during school breaks. He was protective of me. He wouldn’t have it if anyone tried to mess with me. One time I complained to him that a boy in my school was constantly getting on my nerves. Stif came all the way from his school to mine to warn the boy to stop messing with me. He almost beat him up, even.

I still remember the first time he kissed me. It happened outside the National Theatre at dawn after one of our SHS events. It was electrifying. I remember how my heart felt bigger in my chest and my love for him increased by a hundred folds.

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We were still waxing strong even after we completed SHS. People always stared at us when we went out. He was handsome so he naturally got attention. I am also beautiful and cute which gets people to stare at me. The two of us together acting all lovey-dovey was kind of a show-stopper. Another reason they stared was because of the way Stif held my hand. No matter what happened he wouldn’t let me go. If there wasn’t enough space for us to hold hands, he would pull me close and hold me like that till we eventually part ways.

The kind of love we shared was the soul-shattering kind. I thought it would last forever. And maybe we would have lasted till eternity if religion hadn’t gotten involved. Yes, our love went stale when his older sister and her husband introduced him to a congregation that forbids its members to donate blood and receive blood transfusions. The first crack in the relationship occurred when he joined the church.

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Things started falling apart when he asked me to join the church. I wasn’t interested in joining the church but he wouldn’t have it. He kept trying to convert me. The religious differences we shared started to take a toll on me. We barely had any loving moments. All that was left were arguments and religious discussions. I couldn’t take it anymore. So I made the difficult choice to move on. It was painful. I was broken but I still left.

I’m now in my late twenties. I haven’t dated much. I am even single. Ohene Asiedu Stif loved the hell out of me and I still miss him. I pray I get someone to love me like he did. Wherever he is, I hope he is well. I hope he remembers that I am his forever muse.

—Stifler’s Muse

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