Weeks ago, my ex-husband called to apologize for all the hurt he caused me three years ago. He cheated, he gaslighted me, he created the impression in the minds of his family that I was the one who cheated so his family would back our divorce.
After battling it for over a year, we got the divorce three years ago. I got to keep the kids but he never called me or the kids to talk to them. Not even on their birthdays or when the kids expressly said they wanted to talk to him. Even in divorce, he kept hurting me. Only for him to call to apologize out of the blue.
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I told him, “I don’t want to hear this over the phone. I want to see you say it to my face and in front of the kids. That’s the only way I would forgive you.”
He came around the next day. I hadn’t seen him in over two years. Right when I opened the door for him, he said, “I’m deeply sorry for everything that happened. I’m a monster. I’m everything you say I am but at this moment, all I want is your forgiveness.”
Hmmmm, hours later, we were both picking our clothes from the floor and putting them on. It lasted longer than anything we ever had while married. I quickly rushed to the bathroom and locked it. I heard him saying he was going. I responded, “alright.”
He came when the kids were sleeping. He didn’t ask to see them or ask how they were.
When I heard the sound of the door shut, I burst into tears. I don’t know what came over me. He didn’t even have to try hard to get me. He was my husband so he knew where to touch to get me. He did it like a man possessed. I’m now here wearing my shame like mascara. I’ve shamed my family, my friends and everyone who stood by me during those hard times this same man caused me.
I Was The Man In The Relationship And He Didn’t Like It
It’s been over a week. He hasn’t texted or called. This makes the feeling even worse. Was he genuinely sorry? Now I can’t tell for sure but I’m sure of one thing, that I’m the cheapest commodity you’d ever find in the market. Herrrh, I’ve never known any regret bigger than this one. Sobs. Tears. It shall be well.
— Ursla
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I am curious, why did you need to hear him or see him say he was sorry?
It probably means you didn’t heal properly. For you to feel it would be better if je jaf called or texted you after what happened means you need therapy to heal properly and let go. You ex probably feels he can have you whenever ymhe wants.
Playing hard girl when you actually haven’t healed won’t help you. Go to therapy, let it all out, learn how to build defences, put yourself first and above the selfish and diabolic desires and needs of your ex.
And sweetheart, don’t feel bad. Just learn from it and move on so je doesn’t meet you at the same spot ever again. And NEVER EVER EVER ALLOW HIM INTO YOUR HOME AGAIN.
A man who does not even care about his own flesh and blood can NEVER LOVE YOU.
True.
This is the reason I would always hesitate to be with someone who has been married before and most especially has kids with the man.
There will always be something to bring them together in one way or the other.
If the woman is not tenacious and strong-willed, you will be at the loosing end as the new man.
You may even father a child that us not yours.
And to you, women, if he comes back and does not show remorse and prove beyond reasonable doubt that he is changed man, don’t open your legs yet, no matter how you feel about him.
I knwi this can be hard sometimes but please, try……
“…that I’m the cheapest commodity you’ll ever find on the market.” You know what, I won’t disagree with you. But also add “weakest.”
Madam, you aren’t the cheapest commodity, never, we are humans probably some part of you still wanted him and you gave in, don’t belittle yourself.
Please put yourself together and move on, it has happened and you’ve learnt your lesson. It’s up to you to either prevent it from happening again or make it happen again.
Just put yourself together.
You shouldn’t say you are cheap please…you are human and you loved him once so don’t blame yourself and just learn from it. He probably didn’t also expect to do what he did and doesnt know how to call you
Fact: he didn’t initiate the physical meeting. He probably was as clueless as yourself of the lingering physical attraction and is blaming himself just as you are. Call him and ask him to speak to the kids before coming to a firm conclusion. And no, you are not weak or cheap. You’re only human.
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