There are two women in my life right now. Akos came into my life first. I met her when I came to this town to work. She was in the front office so anytime I went there, I saw her. She wasn’t responsible for the kind of work that I was doing but each morning when she saw me, she made herself readily available to help out. When my items were delayed, she would be working behind the scenes to get everything sorted out. I took notice of her and decided to get closer to her. We exchanged contacts one day and I told her, “I will call immediately I close from work today.” I never called. Two days later when she hadn’t heard from me she called me, “Amos, I hope everything is alright. I haven’t seen you in two days and you haven’t called as promised. What’s happening to you?”

That evening we met at her place. It was on short notice but this lady was able to prepare meals and served me when I got there. Akos is beautiful. You have to see her face to understand the kind of beauty I’m talking about. I’ve never seen her in makeup or in a wig but no matter how she dresses, she looks beautiful. I decided to make her my girlfriend but I wasn’t in a hurry to propose. She saw through me and knew that I liked her. She thought I was having a hard time or he thought I was finding it hard to propose to her. I wasn’t. I had been a bad boy before. Proposing to a woman comes very easy to me but at some point when life hit me very hard, I laid low with women and decided the next woman I date would be my wife.

It was the reason I was taking things slowly with her. We met often at my house or in her house. One evening she asked me, “So who are we now?” I answered, “We are friends. What else can we be apart from friends?” She asked me, “So I can date anyone who comes my way? It won’t hurt you when that happens?” I admitted the truth; “It will hurt me that you’ll be out of my life. That I won’t see you often as I used to and I can’t come to your place and eat the best food like I used to. But whoever will have you would be one lucky guy.” She asked me, “And you don’t want to be that one lucky guy?” I answered, “It’s not the right time for me so I don’t want to rush.” 

She told me, “I have others knocking on my door. I’m not entertaining them because I felt we could be something. Make up your mind before it’s too late.” 

I love the beginning of a friendship with women, at that stage when there’s nothing going on. Things escalate quickly immediately after love enters the frame. I knew she liked me but I was taking my time. There was another reason for my hesitation and that reason was Akua. She’s in the same church with me. The first person I became friends with when I was introduced in the church. Our friendship became easier when we realized that we lived closer to each other. So she will dress up for church, walk to my house and wait until I’m ready. We were in the same youth group in the church and we did a lot of things together. Even when there was nothing between us, people started speculating that we were dating.

Akua too is one beautiful girl who takes things of the Lord seriously. I love her calm nature. I love her approach to life and I love the fact that she’s a virgin. After work, we spend a lot of time together. We live not too far apart so it makes things easier. One evening, Akos came around and met Akua in my room watching TV. There’s only one chair in my room and Akua was sitting in that chair. She greeted me and sat next to me on the bed. I wasn’t ok. I was looking at Akua and gauging her emotions. She didn’t say anything again until she told me, “I need to go home, it’s late.” By that time, Akos was comfortably sleeping in my bed. She took one look at her and walked out.

Akos got up and started asking questions; “Is she the reason why you don’t want us to move on from where we are now? Is she your girlfriend? Just let me know and I will understand.” I told her calmly, “She’s just a friend. We are in church together and live close to each other so she comes around when she could.” She said, “I’m a woman. The look on that girl’s face doesn’t look like someone who’s just a friend to you. If you think she’s a friend then let me tell you this, she likes you.” We argued all night. She wanted me to make up my mind. I told her there was no mind to make. She left my place with anger in her heart.

After that incident, both of them started giving me a cold shoulder. Akua will get ready for church and won’t come to my place again. She’ll pass by my house silently and go to church. I asked her, “What’s the issue? Are we fighting?” She answered, “I don’t want trouble. I’m not that strong to fight another woman. I just want to stay in my lane.” I apologized to her. I swore Akos wasn’t anything to me. She said, “A girl who’s nothing to you won’t sleep comfortably in your bed. I’m not a kid to be told that story.” Whatever I said didn’t make sense to her. She continued keeping her distance while I kept trying to get her forgiveness. On the other side was Akos who swore she would never come to me again until I make up my mind. From all indications, I was losing these great women in my life. They became my headache. They wouldn’t pick up my calls or even respond to my text.

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One evening, I begged Akos and she came around. While talking, passion flew up the ceiling and we got involved. I started it. I felt that was the only way I could make her understand that I wanted her in my life. After the sex, she asked me, “So who are we now?” I couldn’t answer. She said, “Well, I won’t force you to be with me but don’t come to me until you tell me who we are.” 

One afternoon, Akua also came around. Immediately after she entered she said, “If you know she’s going to come around anytime soon, let me leave. I don’t like trouble.” A few minutes after she settled down, Akos walked in. She came around unannounced. I was shocked. Again, she came to sleep in my bed because Akua was seated in my chair. 

Akua got up and left without saying a word. I stayed in the room with Akos without saying a word until she also got up and left. Since then, both of them have refused to talk to me or pick up my calls. I know I have to decide on one and go the extra mile to make her believe me. Akos is a good woman. She has it all. Akua is a good woman too. She has it all and is a virgin. Not that being a virgin means anything but it’s something that differentiates her from Akos. 

Who do I choose? 

If I had my way and both of them will see things my way, I would have married the two of them. Currently, that’s not on the table and I need to decide before it’s too late. Sometimes I also think I should let both of them go. If I can’t decide then I don’t deserve any of them. I have to set them free so they can fall for whoever is bold enough to win their love. If I wasn’t selfish, I would have listened to my own advice but I’m that selfish so I want one without losing the other. What do I do? Or I’m getting mad?

—Amos

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